Is your relationship going down the tubes?
Do you give your girlfriend more than one reason to leave you?
Then you should learn how to stop being a jealous boyfriend, before she has enough and packs her suitcase. In case you really have this problem it is just a matter of time until she will end the relationship, unless you finally do something about your situation and start to overcome your limitations.
Do you know the fastest way to get rid of every woman?
Well, the fastest way might still be domestic violence, but I am pretty sure that an extreme form of jealousy comes right after that. I am really sorry to say this, but if you have this problem and you don’t do something about it your girlfriend WILL leave you sooner or later. Unless you date an emotionally unstable woman who has more insecurities than both Olsen twins together, she will definitely leave you after a while.
No emotionally healthy and confident woman stays together with an insecure wimp with jealousy issues. That’s a fact.
You can either cry about it or you can do something about it. Take your right arm, place it on the area under your belly button and tell me if you feel a dick and two balls? You do? Great, then learning how to stop being a jealous boyfriend will be pretty easy for you.
A confident, great, interesting man who knows that he can have a lot of women doesn’t have this problem. He is too busy living his awesome life and dating an amazing or many amazing women. You have all the potential in the world to be that guy. You just have to work on yourself and on your beliefs.
But wait. Maybe you don’t even know that your behavior is slowly but steadily destroying your relationship…
How to Stop Being a Jealous Boyfriend: The Misconception
What if you think that your jealous behavior actually improves your relationship?
In this case you definitely suffer from a widespread disease that is called social conditioning. I don’t care whether you heard it from your mother, from movies, from songs or from some of your friends who live in toxic relationships that they regard as completely normal, but I am pretty sure that you have heard a sentence like this before:
“You are jealous? She must be really important to you.”
Sentences like that are responsible for a lot of breakups and divorces all around the world.
I really don’t want to know what the guy in the following video would have done if they wouldn’t have screamed “it’s a prank!”:
In the same way as there are still men who think that expensive gifts and flowers make a woman fall in love with them, there are also quite a few men who believe that jealousy is not just normal, but actually good.
Jealousy is NOT a Sign of Love
“Oh, he is jealous. He must really love her.”
No he doesn’t. He is just so insecure that he is always afraid that she jumps in bed with another dude.
That has nothing to do with love, but with deep-seated insecurities that can be really dangerous. The people who romanticize jealousy and who say that this is normal when you love someone are the same people who are completely shocked when one of those jealous guys is in the news because he killed the secret lover of his girlfriend.
Do you want to end like this? No?
Then stop talking yourself into believing that being jealous has anything to do with being in love.
Of course this feeling is triggered when you are around a person who you are in love with, but it has nothing to do with the actual feeling of being in love.
The main reason why I decided to write this article is because I don’t want you to become one of those guys who do something really, really stupid, just because you didn’t learn to control their feelings.
If you constantly worry about whether or not your girlfriend is cheating on you, you force her to cheat on you. The more of this behavior you show her, the more she’ll lose her respect and her attraction for you. She won’t want to sleep with you anymore, but she will for sure sleep with the confident guy next door.
Jealousy is NOT the Same as Mistrust
Another popular misconception is the equalization of jealousy and mistrust. Let’s say you have a girlfriend who already cheated on you. You were naive enough to believe that she will never do it again, despite the fact that you have experienced it firsthand and despite all the warnings you heared from her ex-boyfriend.
If you then worry that she might cheat on you this is totally understandable. But it has absolutely nothing to do with jealousy. What you feel in this situation is mistrust. You don’t trust her, because you know what she is capable of and you have reference experiences that support this fear.
Even though this is also a negative feeling, it is a justified feeling that you should have in this situation. You don’t need to learn how to stop being a jealous boyfriend. You simply need to get rid of your cheating girlfriend.
Being jealous is something entirely different.
Jealousy is a negative feeling that is unfounded and that only exists in your mind and your heart.
If you constantly think about how your girlfriend cheats on you, even if she never gave you any reason to have this fear and you know on a logical level that you can trust her, you have a serious issue and you need to learn how to stop being a jealous boyfriend.
Jealousy Has NOTHING to Do With Your Girlfriend
I hope you understand the difference of justified mistrust and unjustified jealousy. In case you understand the difference, you will agree with me when I say that being jealous has absolutely nothing to do with your girlfriend.
I can even show you what I mean by using my social circle as an example. I haven’t seen one of my best female friends for quite a long time. Not because we don’t get along with each other, but because she is together with an extremely jealous guy who definitely has to learn how to stop being a jealous boyfriend.
Even though he has absolutely no logical reason to have this feeling (she never cheated on him), they had a terrible fight after I met her the last time. It can only take a few months until she leaves him and somehow this is really sad, because according to my friend he is a really great guy, except from his “little problem”. What he doesn’t realize is that he digs his own grave.
My friend then told me via Facebook that he always blames her for being too outgoing and extroverted, for having so many male friends and for meeting a guy who obviously knows what he has to do to get her into bed.
He blames her for everything but the only person he has to blame is himself.
Not every outgoing and extroverted girl cheats. And just because I know how to seduce women doesn’t mean that I destroy a life-long friendship to have some fun.
All he does is to blame his girlfriend for his own feelings. He projects all his negative energy on her, while he tries to convince her that she is the root of the problem. The truth is that he is the root and he will also be the axe that brings him to fall.
Jealousy Is All About You and Your Beliefs
How can you stop being the jealous boyfriend that you are right now?
Before you can reprogram your mind to become a guy who doesn’t even know how the word jealousy is spelled, you have to rifle through your beliefs to find out where you have to reprogram yourself.
Stop wasting your time talking yourself into believing that it is your girlfriend’s fault, especially when you know that there is absolutely no logical reason to feel the way you feel.
Start taking full responsibility for your thoughts and actions.
I say it one last time: If you don’t stop being jealous, your fears will come true and she will end up leaving you. You are the man and the leader in the relationship. It is your job to lead yourself and your relationship out of this misery.
You Are Afraid to Lose Her
You are afraid and if you are really honest to yourself, you know exactly what your biggest fear is. You are afraid to lose her, because you love her so much.
Are you really afraid because you love her so much?
I already told you that jealousy has nothing to do with love. I also love my girlfriend but I can’t remember one second in which I was afraid that she would leave me. I never had that feeling, even though we often live thousands of miles away from each other.
Deep down you know that it has nothing to do with love, but with deep-rooted fears.
You are afraid to lose her because you are afraid that you will never be able to find a girl like her again. You fear that if she leaves you, this feeling of happiness that she gives you will go with her. You are afraid of ending up alone and miserable.
And why do you feel that way?
You Feel Unworthy and Insecure
The reason why you feel this way is pretty simple: You are insecure.
If you would be a confident man who knows that he is interesting, valuable and that he deserves to be loved, you wouldn’t waste one second of your precious lifetime with negative feelings like jealousy.
You might get aggressive and you might even hate me for what I just said, but I am not here to butter you up, I am here to help you.
Those negative feelings that you have can directly be attributed to insecurity and to a feeling of unworthiness. If you would believe that you deserve your girlfriend, that you are worthy of having her by your side, you wouldn’t be jealous at all.
I know that I deserve my girlfriend and if you don’t think that you deserve your girlfriend, you should start to work on yourself and on your lifestyle until you understand that you deserve her. If you don’t do that, she will look out for a man who knows that he deserves a woman like her. No woman wants to be together with a guy who feels unworthy of her.
You Compare Yourself to Others
What is it besides your fears, your insecurities and your feeling of unworthiness that transforms you from a confident lover into a desperate and jealous boyfriend?
Please correct me if I am wrong but I am pretty sure that you tend to compare yourself to other people, especially to other guys.
How do I know that? Well, there was a time when I also had to learn how to stop being a jealous boyfriend. When I think back to the time with my ex-girlfriend I realize that I had those negative feelings in certain situations.
I only felt this way around people who I thought I couldn’t keep up with.
Let me ask you two questions to show you what I mean:
Do you feel angry and helpless when your girlfriend talks to a guy who weighs 200 kilos and who drives a car that looks like a horse-drawn carriage?
Probably not, because you think that you are better in comparison to him.
Do you feel angry and helpless when your girlfriend enjoys talking to a muscular guy who looks like a swimsuit model, while they stand next to his new Porsche?
Now you probably feel a little bit different.
The question is: why?
The answer is: you think that you win the comparison with guy number one, but you are convinced that you lose the comparison with guy number two.
That’s not a good sign.
In order to keep amazing, confident and exceptionally beautiful women in your life, you have to become a man who feels so good in his own skin that he doesn’t even think about comparing himself to other people.
Therefore, you need to reprogram your mind.
How to Stop Being a Jealous Boyfriend: Reprogram Your Mind
How do you have to reprogram your mind to leave all this jealousy bullshit behind you and to rescue your relationship by becoming a guy who gives his girlfriend the feeling that he deserves her and that she deserves him?
Simply telling yourself that you are not jealous anymore and that everything is fine from now on is a good start, but it won’t be enough.
You have to reprogram your brain on a logical and on an emotional level.
Due to the fact that you are a man and that you love to think logically, I want to start with the reprogramming steps that you can take on a logical level.
Use Your Logical Sense
When I shared the difference between mistrust and jealously with you I told you that you have every right in the world to mistrust your girlfriend when she already cheated on you, whereas jealousy is just an emotion that has no logical reason.
Now that you have this definition in mind I want to ask you a simple question that can already help you to overcome your negative feelings:
Do you have any logical reason to feel the way you feel?
The fact that your girlfriend is extroverted doesn’t count.
I am talking about real logical reasons that would make another person understand why you feel that way.
In case she has never cheated on you, has never shown any signs of cheating and hasn’t been unfaithful in her past relationships, you have no logical reason whatsoever to be jealous.
Become Aware of Your Positive Features
Why do you feel insecure and unworthy?
Why do you communicate to your girlfriend that you think that you don’t deserve her?
I am sure that you have a hell of a lot of good characteristics and personality traits that you aren’t even aware of.
Unless you have killed her mother or are an expert in domestic violence, you shouldn’t think about yourself as unworthy and you shouldn’t feel the need to express this feeling through your behavior.
I am sure you can be a real gentleman if you want. I am also pretty sure that you have at least one interesting hobby that you are passionate about. I know that you are not a complete loser, otherwise you wouldn’t invest the time to read this article in order to improve your life.
In fact, I am convinced that you are a very interesting person. Otherwise you wouldn’t be on this website and you wouldn’t want to change your life to the better by learning how to stop being a jealous boyfriend. Embrace your positive characteristics and accept the fact that you are an awesome guy who deserves an awesome girlfriend.
Stop Comparing Yourself to Others
The only problem you might have is that you are aware of all your positive features, but you are still scared that your girlfriend will end up in bed with another guy. If this is true you should think about whether or not you tend to compare yourself to others.
You can be a great guy, but if you compare yourself to the wrong people, you will always feel like an unworthy piece of shit.
I think I don’t have to tell you that this is not only harmful for your decision to learn how to stop being a jealous boyfriend, but also for your life in general.
Of course you will feel ugly when you compare yourself with Chris Hemsworth and you will feel poor if you compare yourself to Warren Buffett. Stop comparing yourself to other people and start to throw the spotlight on all your positive characteristics. By doing this you will see that you don’t have any reason to have those negative feelings.
Jealousy Triggers are Compliments
Now it is time to rethink the situations that usually triggered negative feelings in you. Before you have read this article you probably thought about killing every guy who dared to stare at your girlfriend. That’s the typical reaction of a guy who suffers from pathological jealousy.
But is it really a bad sign when another guy checks out your girlfriend?
A guy who learned how to stop being jealous knows that it is nothing bad at all and that there is absolutely no reason to get angry.
When my girlfriend wears a tight dress and high heels I am surprised when I see one guy who doesn’t check her out.
Does this make me feel angry? No, of course not!
I feel proud to have a beautiful girlfriend who gets stared at. This is not only a compliment for her, but also for me and for my qualities as a man and as a seducer.
The next time somebody checks out your girlfriend you simply smile. When other guys gaze at your girlfriend it shows that you are a great seducer, that you have what it takes to attract an amazing woman into your life and that you are on the right path.
Summed Up Wisdom
What do you have to do if you want to learn how to stop being a jealous boyfriend? First of all, you have to unlearn three popular misconceptions. Jealousy has nothing to do with love, it is not the same as mistrust and it has absolutely nothing to do with your girlfriend. It only exists in your mind and heart because you are afraid to lose her, you feel insecure and because you make the common mistake to compare yourself to others.
How to stop being a jealous boyfriend? Reprogram your mind and change your beliefs. Use your logical sense and realize that you have no reason to feel the way you feel. Realize that you are a cool guy and that you have a lot of positive qualities that help you to keep an amazing woman in your life. Stop comparing yourself to others and smile whenever someone checks out your girlfriend. It shows that you have what it takes to get and to keep a girl like her.