Are you one of the 132 guys who sent me an email with the subject line Dating Japanese Girls?
Within the past two years I received exactly 132 emails from guys with questions, such as…
- Are Japanese girls easy?
- Do they like white men?
- Do they like sex?
Does she like it?
Heck, it took me a whole day to sift through my emails and to write down all the questions you had. But I did it and I can tell you that it wasn’t fun.
I had more fun when I was in Tokyo.
It has been two years since I’ve been to Japan, but the memories will never fade…
…the memories of Asuka.
No, I’m not talking about the crazy wrestler girl with the red hair. Asuka is the girl I dated while I was in Tokyo. And even though I never made her my girlfriend, I dedicate this guide to her.
She’s an amazing woman and you can thank her for encouraging me to create:
- The Biggest Japanese Girls Q&A in the history of the internet.
- A Step-By-Step Tutorial to meet girls on the largest Japanese dating site.
- The Ultimate Guide to dating and marrying (be careful what you wish for) Japanese girls.
I could have turned this article into three articles or into a profitable eBook.
But because I’m a complete idiot nice guy, I’m now going to share everything about dating Japanese girls with you for free…
The Big Japanese Girls Q&A (16 Answers)
Yes, I received 132 emails about dating Japanese women but that doesn’t mean that I had to answer 132 different questions.
Some of the questions were so weird that I decided not to share them (ask me in the comments below).
But most of them made it into this Q&A.
That’s why I decided to start this article with a comprehensive Q&A that reveals the truth about the girls you dream of and fantasize of.
1. Are Japanese Girls Easy?
About 25% of the emails contained this question.
Here’s the answer:
It depends.
Okay, okay. I’m sorry. I know that you want a better answer. Here it is:
- It’s ridiculously easy to seduce Gaijin Hunters (more on them later).
- It’s not that easy if you hit on traditional Japanese girls.
- It’s 100 times easier to get laid in Japan if you are white.
That’s the truth in a summed up version.
Some Japanese girls would give their Louis Vuitton bags for dating a Western guy.
Others won’t touch you because they are afraid that their parents will kill them.
In general, however, it’s way easier to attract and date Japanese girls than to survive the dating game in the West, especially if you are white.
2. Do Japanese Women Like White Men?
The color of your skin determines your dating success, at least in Japan. I know it sounds racist, but I don’t make the rules.
Japanese girls are obsessed with Western facial features.
While we think that long noses look funny, they love them. While we think about tanning ourselves, they love our white skin.
Oh, and in case you’re a Caucasian man, they assume all kinds of things about you:
- You are more romantic.
- You show affection.
- You want to have sex with real women.
She has seen enough Hollywood movies to fantasize about a confident Caucasian lover and because she is way too shy to initiate the conversation, she waits until you show up.
3. Do Japanese Women Like Black Men?
I don’t want to lie to you.
The only reason why one of my black friends had success in Japan was because he told every girl that he’s from the USA. He’s not. But whenever he said that he was born in Africa, the girls turned away.
Interracial dating is tough in japan…at least if you’re not white.
I’m sure that there are quite a few Japanese girls who are attracted to black men. No doubt. However, she knows that her family would be shocked because Japanese women who are dating black men are not as common…and because of the half-black babies.
Let’s say it like this:
The societal rules make it hard to find a girl who wants to commit to you, but not impossible to find a girl who wants to experience how it’s like to “be” with a black man.
4. Do Japanese Women Like American Men?
Why don’t you see it for yourself?
- Join the largest Japanese dating site.
- Tell the girls you contact that you are from the USA.
- See what happens.
"I love you!"
Japanese women like all Western men, but some of them are specifically looking for American men. I chatted with a few girls on Japan Cupid who were disappointed when they found out that I’m not American.
5. Why are Japanese Girls so Hot?
They got it from their mommas.
Sexy Japanese mothers have sexy daughters. That’s why Japanese women are beautiful. But their genetics are not the only reason why (Western men think) they are hot.
- They are tiny and skinny.
- They have smooth white skin.
- Their hair is even softer than their skin.
- Their makeup makes them look like the girls you see in Hentai movies
- They are bubbly, playful, and act shy.
Oh, and don’t forget that they do everything to look kawaii (cute).
They wear miniskirts in winter and they even screw up their teeth on purpose. While Western women do everything to look more independent manly, Japanese girls do everything to look as feminine as possible.
God, now I think of Asuka again.
6. Am I a Pervert Because I Love Japanese Girls?
Yes, you are. Go kill yourself.
Nah, I’m just kidding. I also love Japanese women and I’m not a pervert. Or wait a second. Maybe I am.
Anyway, just because you wake up in the morning with the thought “I want to date a Japanese girl” doesn’t mean that you’re a pervert. And just because you say “I want to marry a Japanese girl” whenever your parents ask you why you don’t date a landwhale from your hometown, doesn’t mean that something is wrong with you.
You’re a heterosexual man who likes feminine Asian women. Welcome to the club.
In fact, you should be proud of yourself because you are one of the few guys who are honest. I mean, isn’t it funny that most guys deny that they are into Japanese girls even though 165.000 men google Japanese movies every month?
And that’s only the number for the USA…
7. Do Japanese Women Like Sex?
Even though Japanese people have the least sex in the world, the women love it. They crave it because they miss it. You’ll soon know why.
The fact that only 24% of all Japanese people are satisfied with their sex life (compared to a global average of 44%) is sad, disturbing, and a result of the weird Japanese culture. But it’s also a blessing for every foreigner who wants to meet Japanese women.
Once she knows that you are a sexually active man, she’ll rip your clothes off.
Continue reading and you’ll find out what it’s like to have sex with a Japanese woman…
8. What is the Best Japanese Dating Site?
Japan Cupid. Period.
I don’t even have to think before answering this question because I have experienced the power of this Japanese dating site with 700.000 members.
- I joined Japan Cupid.
- I contacted girls in Tokyo, Osaka, and Yokohama.
- I received replies like this…
Click here to see more messages from cute Japanese girls
9. What are the Differences between Chinese and Japanese Women?
I’ve never dated a Chinese woman, but my girlfriend is half Chinese. But that doesn’t count because she was born and raised in Thailand.
But my friend Paul is married to a Chinese woman.
And even though I love Paul and his wife, I have to admit that there are some things that Japanese girls do better.
- They are better at dressing up and wearing makeup.
- Japanese girls are more submissive and less competitive than Chinese girls.
- Chinese girls are loud and Japanese girls are the complete opposite.
I know who I prefer and if you come to the same conclusion, you should continue with the next question…
10. How Are Japanese Girls Compared to American Women?
Come one. Seriously?
I don’t remember who asked me this question, but I still remember the reply I gave:
“Open your eyes!”
That’s like comparing Han Solo with Jabba the Hutt.
Next question…
11. What Do Japanese Women Want in a Man?
They want a man who wants them.
I know, that sounds so simple. But for a lot of women in Japan, finding a man who wants them is more difficult than catching a mosquito with two chopsticks.
For reasons that I will explain later, Japanese girls want a man who…
- Wants to have sex with her.
- Is confident enough to express his feelings.
- Makes her feel somethings.
There’s one thing I know from Asuka:
Most Japanese girls are emotionally starving, sexually frustrated and willing to do everything to change that.
12. Are Japanese Women Faithful?
Heck, most of them don’t even have sex.
If you live in a culture in which men are more interested in virtual reality movies than in the real thing, you don’t think about cheating on the guy who actually wants to touch you.
Let’s say it like this:
As long as you give her the emotional experience she craves for, she’ll be faithful.
If you, however, treat her like most Japanese guys treat their wives (sorry guys, but it’s true), she’ll look out for someone who can make her feel alive.
13. Are Japanese Women Submissive?
Submissiveness is a part of their culture.
- They dress cute, act cute and speak in a high-pitched voice to be even cuter.
- They are so passive that it can be irritating.
- Most of them say yes to everything you do, say, or suggest.
So yeah, they are submissive.
In fact, I can’t think of another Asian country where the women are that submissive.
15. What is Dating in Japan as a Foreigner Really Like?
At first you’re like…
Then you’re like…
And then she’s like…
16. What Are Japanese Women Like?
Okay, I have to admit it.
The question “what are Japanese women like?” was in more than 20 of the 132 emails.
The only reason why I put it at the end of this Q&A is because I dedicated the next chapter to this question…
16 Types of Japanese Girls You Want to Date (or Avoid)
Understanding Japanese women is not that easy. I mean, there are more than 60.000.000 of them and each and every one of them is different. They all have different characteristics, qualities, hopes.
Yes, most of them have weird styles, cute eyes, and dye hair. But you can’t just say that THIS is how a typical Japanese girl is like.
I do it anyway…19 times.
What are Japanese women like?
Have a look at the following list and tell me in the comments below which kind of girl you want to date.
1. Japanese School Girls
Come on, I had to start with this type of girl.
I know that you have been fantasizing about Japanese school girls since you started reading this article.
Every man has a thing for Japanese school girls.
Am I right?
The ones who say they don’t are either liars or gay.
The best thing is that a lot of women in Japan, even the ones who finished high school and university, walk around in school girl uniforms and miniskirts. It’s their style and it’s damn sexy.
2. Japanese Mail Order Brides
You can meet thousands of these girls on Japan Cupid.
However, Japanese brides are not your typical mail order brides.
They neither want your money nor a green card. A lot of single Japanese women are looking for men online because they are sick and tired of dating the local guys.
3. Japanese Ladyboys
They are easier to detect than Thai ladyboys. That’s the good news. They are better at spotting and chasing Western men than Gaijin Hunters. That’s the bad news.
Be careful who you take home. Look at her hands and her throat before you get all excited.
4. Japanese Guys that Look Like Girls
Sorry, I have more bad news for you.
In case you approach girls in Japan and one of them looks at you with a weirded out face, she might be a guy. But don’t worry. Ladyboys are famous for keeping their identity a secret until you see the wiener. Guys don’t do that…unless they are gay and have an evil plan.
5. Japanese Bad Girls
There are three types of Japanese bad girls:
- Ganguro girls
- Japanese Bosozoku girls
- Yakuza girls
Ganguro girls only pretend to be bad girls. They are tanned, wear tons of makeup, and want to rebel a bit. They are harmless.
What about the Japanese Bosozoku girls?
They are also sick and tired of a culture of conformity, but tanning and wearing makeup is not enough for them. They are outlaws who are famous for illegal races and for being hot as hell…
Don’t burn your hands.
What about the Yakuza girls?
They are more than tattooed women. They are the girlfriends, wives, and mistresses of some of the most brutal gangsters in the world.
Don’t even think about it.
6. Japanese Gravure Model
What the hell are Japanese Gravure models?
Glad you ask.
These are the girls you see on the cover of men’s magazines, on DVD covers, and in swimsuit magazines. They are also called Gravure Idols and there’s even an award for them, the Gravure Idol award.
They are damn sexy and they haven’t been used up and spit out by the movie industry…yet.
7. Japanese Moviestars
165.000 searches for Japanese movies in the USA. That says it all. But it gets worse, or better, it all depends on the way you look at it.
According to an adult production employee, it is common knowledge that one out of 200 Japanese girls has “acted” in a movie.
That’s absolutely insane!
Just think about it. You talk to 200 Japanese girls online and at least one of them has worked as an actress. While you fall in love with her big round eyes and her innocent smile, she thinks about her last experience.
I still don’t know what to think about that…
8. Foreign Women in Japan
I have to be honest. I would feel weird dating a Japanese star.
But I would feel even weirder if I dated a foreign woman in Japan, especially a Western woman. Some of them might be nice. But most of them have some serious mental issues.
Look at me! I'm Asian! I can be beautiful too!
It’s always the same:
- They run around with cat ears and press their overweight bodies in school girl skirts.
- Everyone in their home country thinks that they are weird.
- They come to Japan because they want to feel pretty and accepted.
And then they cry about how all Japanese men are hypocrites for preferring slim Japanese women over “curvy” girls.
Sorry, but that’s just…
9. Japanese Cosplay Girls
I think you know what cosplay girls are. And I think you also know that some of them are damn sexy, at least the Japanese cosplay girls.
In case that’s your thing, I have very good news for you:
They don’t just wear their dresses to certain events. Some of them wear them while taking a walk in the city or sipping a coffee at Starbucks. Yes, japan is a weird, weird place.
10. Japanese Women for Sale
I don’t recommend that you take this route because it can lead to an empty wallet, sex addiction, and tripper.
The choice, however, is yours.
I just want you to know that there are more than 5.000 hostess bars in Tokyo that employ at least 50.000 girls in their twenties.
Don’t ever believe a hostess when she says that she only provides company. She is and will always be a bar girl aka a prostitute.
11. Japanese Geishas
They are also called the ladies of the night.
And no, you won’t meet a Geisha in a run-down hostess bar in Tokyo. They are entertainers, not just in the sexual way. In fact, some of them don’t even offer sexual services but most of them complete a long training to become master entertainers.
Your only chance to meet a real Geisha is to explore Japan’s high society. Good luck with that.
12. The Ugly Japanese Girl
It’s hard to find an ugly girl in Tokyo.
But every once in a while you walk up to a girl, look into her face and see...
Just so that you know: She won’t believe you when you tell her that you want to go on a date with her and she probably won’t even talk to you because she’s too shy.
13. Gaijin Hunters
You can either love them or hate them, but you can’t deny that there are a lot of them.
But I’m pretty sure that you love them. I mean, you are a Gaijin (a foreigner). And let’s be honest. Every man loves the idea of getting chased by girls.
Japanese women like white men. Gaijin hunters love white men.
They are addicted to Caucasians and no matter how exciting it might be to date such a girl, this is the danger.
Don’t expect a Gaijin hunter to be faithful. She will only be faithful until the next foreigner smiles at her, even if it’s a guy like David Bond…
14. Japanese Business Woman
Don’t run away now!
I said Japanese business woman, not Western business woman.
This is a huge difference because successful Japanese ladies…
- Are still feminine.
- Don’t live in a Sex and the City fantasy world.
- Have a really hard time finding a man.
In case you don’t mind that she earns more money than you, they can be great girlfriends and wives. The only downside is that you will never see your wife because she always sleeps at the office.
15. Traditional Japanese Women
The average Japanese girl is traditional.
- She loses her virginity later than girls from any Western country.
- One-night stands are more common on US college campuses than in Tokyo.
- She cares more about what her family thinks of her than a Western girl cares about what her cat thinks of her.
I think I don’t have to tell you why traditional Japanese women are the perfect girlfriends.
16. The Japanese Girl with the Banana
Then, of course, there is the famous Japanese girl with the Banana…
How could I possibly forget her?
Why Japanese Girls Want to Date You (And Not a Japanese Guy)
A good friend of mine is Japanese.
His name is Joshi. Yes, his name is really Joshi and no, he isn’t green. He lives in Bangkok and the reason why he lives in Bangkok is the same reason why Japanese girls don’t want to date the local guys.
The (sick) Japanese Culture
Feel free to argue with me in the comments below if you think that the Japanese culture is completely healthy. I don’t think so.
And even though men suffer more under this culture, the women suffer too because they are sick and tired of dating machines that they see once a month until they die…
The Japanese Sex Culture Turns Japanese Men into Dysfunctional Creeps
The Japanese sex culture is destroying lives and turning normal men into weirdos that no woman wants to date.
Why do you think Japan Cupid has hundreds of thousands of female members who are looking for Wester men?
They are desperate. All they want is to meet a normal man, which seems to be impossible. It’s a shame that the only option for these women is to settle for Japanese men who…
- Grope Japanese girls on trains and at work.
- Like it when a girls screams in pain during sex.
- Think that a girl enjoys it when you lick her face like a dog.
- Don’t even leave their apartment, let alone talk to women (more than half a million young people, 80% men)
- Dump their girlfriends for virtual girlfriends, dating simulation, romance games, and sex suits.
Nicely said, sex in the Japanese culture is one chaotic stream of weirdness.
The Japanese Working Culture Gives them the Rest
What if a Japanese girl is lucky enough to find a man who doesn’t dump her for a virtual girlfriend after he licked her face and groped her?
Well, there’s a high chance that he can’t get it up when he comes home because he’s too exhausted.
It doesn’t surprise me that most relationships and marriages in Japan are sexless. What do you expect in a culture where dying from overwork (Karoshi) is completely normal.
It also doesn’t surprise me that young men don’t think about going on dates, seducing women, and being good lovers when stress, burn out, and suicidal thoughts dictate their lives.
No wonder that 55% of Japanese women have an affair. They risk their honor and their financial security to fulfill their human needs.
I hope you are ready to give them what they crave so desperately.
Where and How to Meet Japanese Women Online
I’m sorry to break it down for you, but most Japanese marriage agencies are overpriced, ineffective, and don’t want you to succeed.
How do I know that?
Well, I have tested dozens of marriage agencies and there are only a handful of them that don’t scam people.
It’s way easier and cheaper to meet girls on the largest Japanese online dating site.
Why THIS is the Best Japanese Dating Site
I already mentioned Japan Cupid in my Q&A when I answered the question “what is the best Japanese dating site?”
There are some free Japanese dating sites, but the ones I tested…
- Have less than 10.000 members compared to the 700.000 members on Japancupid.com.
- Are full of profiles with fake photos of half-naked girls.
- Don’t offer any support.
Yep, that’s the problem when you operate a free dating site. You don’t have the money to hire people who detect scammers, delete fake profiles, and give support.
Japan Cupid does all of this...
How to Meet Japanese Girls Online
“What do I write in my profile?”
“What do I say in my first message?”
“How do I get dates with cute Japanese girls?
Calm down. It’s not that hard.
You can meet hundreds of thousands of Japanese women online who are looking for marriage, a boyfriend, or a romance.
I’ve done it want to show you, step-by-step, how you can do it too.
Check Out the Ultimate Step-by-Step Japan Cupid Guide
Dating Japanese Women: A How-to Guide
Now you know everything about the types of Japanese girls, why they want you, and where you can meet them.
But do you also know how to date a Japanese woman?
I have to warn you.
The Japanese dating culture is not as weird as the sex culture, but it’s weird enough to give you the creeps.
Finding a cute Gaijin Hunter who wants to sleep with you is easy. It’s a lot harder to find a girlfriend who isn’t crazy.
Have a look at what it’s really like to date a Japanese woman and how you can enjoy (and survive) it.
How to Pick up Japanese Women
It doesn’t matter if you approach a girl at the Takashimaya Times Square or if you chat with her online before you meet her in person. Her reaction will be the same.
- She smiles like a child.
- She doesn’t speak, she giggles.
- She does everything to appear cute.
But that doesn’t mean that she likes you.
I mean, if you chatted with her online and she agreed to meet you, she likes you. But if you meet her on the street or in a mall, this reaction doesn’t mean anything.
Japanese girls are born and raised in a culture of conformity and obedience. She would never be rude to you. You don’t have to be afraid of nasty rejections.
However, you need to understand that a smile from a Japanese girl can either mean “take me” or “f off”.
How to Impress a Japanese Woman with Compliments
That’s why it’s so important to know how to impress a Japanese woman.
And how do you do that?
That’s easy! Just speak Japanese.
Yes, I am serious but no, I don’t expect you to be fluent and I also don’t ask you to buy a translation device, even though this one is pretty amazing…
All you have to do to impress a Japanese woman is to know one or two compliments. Your job is to make her smile, not to have a conversation about the meaning of life.
Here are some words you can use:
- How to say beautiful in Japanese? Kireina
- How to say I love you so much in Japanese? Anata o hontoni aishiteimasu
- How to Say Go f Yourself in Japanese? Anata jishin no fakku
Only use the last one if a local guy tries to cockblock you.
How to Get a Japanese Girl to Like You
It’s easy to get a Japanese girl to like you when you know what Japanese guys don’t like.
Sounds confusing?
I’ll explain...
Most Japanese guys want girls who are cute, dumb and naive.
I get it. I love cute girls and you love them too. That’s why you are reading this dating guide. But what shocks me is that they prefer dumb girls. Apparently, education and intelligence intimidates them.
You don’t believe me?
That’s a gift from heaven.
There are thousands of beautiful and intelligent Japanese girls who NEVER met a guy who appreciates their intelligence.
Be the first one who says “I love that you’re so smart” and you’ll be the first one she wants to meet.
How to use the Japanese Dating Etiquette to Your Advantage
I told you about the stressed-out and overworked Japanese guys who don’t even want to have sex.
Heck, one of the main complains of Western women who date Japanese guys is that they don’t show affection, spend more time with their colleagues than with them, and are incapable of sharing their feelings. And no, I don’t make this stuff up.
Does your future Japanese girlfriend want you to be like that?
Hell no!
- She wants a confident man who says what he thinks and does what he says.
- She wants a man who makes her feel like a woman.
- She wants a man who is sexually dominant.
Why do you think every YouTube video in which a Caucasian guy picks up a Japanese girl by being dominant and direct gets so many hate comments?
Because it works!
How to Seduce Japanese Women
There’s one trick I haven’t revealed yet.
It’s the ultimate seduction weapon and it’s something she fantasizes about in her naughtiest dreams. But no foreigner has ever done it.
How to seduce Japanese women: Kabe Don
“Kabe what the heck?”
Don’t worry. I also haven’t heard of it before I met Asuka. Since I met her I used this move with every Asian girl. Yes, also with my girlfriend.
The idea is simple:
You pin a girl to the wall by thrusting your hand against it. Then you kiss her.
They see it how Manga girls get Kabe Donned and now they want to experience it too…especially with a confident foreigner like you.
How to Get a Japanese Girlfriend
Oh, don’t worry about that.
She will ask you to be her husband after one night, maybe even while you’re having sex for the first time.
Japanese girls might act cute and innocent, but when they meet a Western guy they like, they do everything to tie him down. And please don’t be so naïve and expect her to be on the pill, just because she doesn’t insist on a condom.
In most Western countries you would call a girl who wants a relationship after one night crazy or overly attached.
In Japan this is called normal.
Just remember that all the playful and cute acting has a purpose. There’s always an agenda and her agenda is to make you her boyfriend.
If that’s what you want, more power to you.
How to Date a Japanese Girl: 4 Final Tips
Here are some final tips on dating Japanese women that help you to enjoy (or at least survive) the daily life with your girlfriend:
- Encourage her to express her thoughts and feelings.
- Let her be playful and bubbly.
- Show your affection and encourage her to do the same.
- Ask her what she really means when she says maybe (it always means no).
Now you are ready to get laid in Japan…
Japanese Girls and Sex: My Experience
Oh God, I can already see all the hate comments for what I’m about to share with you.
I will probably get roasted by angry feminists who tell me that I’m worthless because I mention “Japanese” and “sex” in one sentence and I might get an angry message from Asuka for revealing too many secrets.
But I do it anyway.
Enjoy the following rant about what it’s really like to have sex with Japanese women…
The Japanese Views on Sex Make Getting Laid Easy
Getting Laid in Japan is not that hard.
Unless you are 100 kilos overweight, you will get laid. Heck, if you are a Caucasian man you might get lucky even though you are 100 kilos overweight.
The Japanese views on sex make it really easy for foreigners.
- It has been normal for married men to have lovers and courtesans.
- Homosexuality and bisexuality are less frowned upon than in other parts of Asia.
- Love motels, eating Sushi from a woman’s body, and renting a sex doll are considered normal.
In other words, Japan is really, really open about sex.
Even though most couples haven’t seen or touched each other in months for reasons I shared earlier, sex is not a taboo topic. It’s a vital part of the culture.
You don’t need to convince a Japanese girl to go wild. She’s ten times kinkier than you.
Japanese Women are Actively Looking for Sex
Just because a lot of Japanese girls don’t have sex doesn’t mean that they don’t want it.
Please don’t be so naïve to believe that Japanese women don’t want sex, just because the mainstream media says it.
"I'm waiting for you..."
The truth is that some beautiful 27-year-old businesswomen spend $10.000 a month on male hosts who listen, show affection.
That says it all.
Sex with Japanese Women is Different
What is it like to have sex with Japanese women?
It’s different and strange. But somehow it’s exciting.
At first they are very shy, so shy that they don’t undress in front of you. She might run to the bathroom to take her clothes of before she runs back to hide under the blanket.
She giggles all the time.
She’s can’t hide the fact that she’s excited but she won’t kiss you because she has been taught to be passive and submissive.
Come on, kiss her.
The moment you kiss her, she knows what you want. Now she’s free to let herself go, which means that she doesn’t just kiss you. She swallows you. When a Japanese girl kisses you, your whole face is wet. But don’t blame her. She learned it from the movies.
How are Japanese women in bed?
Japanese girls don’t have sex. They let sex happen. They are so passive that you are tempted to ask…
It can take a few times until she’s comfortable enough to show her wild side. Once she is comfortable, you are up for a surprise.
The Truth about being Married to a Japanese Woman (2 Experience Reports)
What if her surprise is really good?
What if your Japanese girlfriend treats you better than any other girl has ever treated you?
The relationship is awesome. She takes care of you. The sex is phenomenal. You are happier than you have ever been and you want to hold on to this feeling. You don’t want to let it go and you don’t want to let her go.
You want to turn your beautiful girlfriend into your Japanese bride.
The question is: Should you do it?
The answer: I have no freaking idea…
Good or bad idea?
…but I found two guys on forums who did it and who were nice enough to share their experiences with me.
They want to stay anonymous. That’s why I call them Rob and Bob. Rob is happily married to his wonderful Japanese wife. Bob wishes he could travel back in time.
I Want to Marry a Japanese Woman! Be Careful What You Wish For
“Be careful what you wish for!!!”
I don’t want to hide the three exclamation marks that Bob used when I asked him how to get a Japanese wife.
He said that it can be tempting to have a young Japanese wife because they look like cute dolls and as a man, you don’t want to stop playing with a cute doll. But he also said that you shouldn’t forget that they are human beings with hopes, dreams, and agendas.
Sometimes her dreams are not your dreams. So be careful.
What’s Rob’s advice to every man who screams “I want a Japanese wife”?
“My Japanese wife is awesome. She cooks for me, she does the laundry, and she complains whenever I neglect my marriage duties…if you know what I mean.”
The Typical Japanese Marriage is Sexless
What does Rob say to the fact that almost half of Japanese marriages are sexless?
She didn't sign up for being lonely
He said the same thing that I said throughout this article.
Most marriages in Japan are sexless because of the emotionally and physically destructive culture.
He said that “it’s not her fault if her husband prefers to play video games after a long day at work.”
Yes, the typical Japanese marriage is sexless, but unless you behave like the typical Japanese guy, you don’t have to worry about that.
International Marriage is Not That Common in Japan
According to Bob, it took him two months and a lot of presents and fake smiles until the parents of his wife agreed to the marriage.
“This ain’t Thailand” he said. “International marriages are not that common in Japan and it can be very difficult to convince Japanese parents that you are a good catch.”
This is the only thing they agree with. Both Rob and Bob told me that it took a long time to convince the parents of their Japanese bride that they are good men.
The Right Marriage Proposal is More Important than You Think
Of course, the Japanese girl you want to marry doesn’t expect you to know about the traditional way of proposing. But it’s definitely an advantage. It’s one of these things that give you brownie points.
“Will you marry me?” sounds great, but that’s not how it’s done in Japan.
You can choose from a traditional “do you want to grow old together?” to a modern attention-seeking firework proposal. Heck, you can even use the very traditional question “do you want to lie in the same grave with me?” (sounds romantic, huh?)
Just remember that you have to get the parent’s permission first.
Arranged Marriage is on the Rise in Japan
“Just make sure that your girlfriend is not promised to another man. Arranged marriages are not that uncommon in Japan. God, I wish my wife was promised to another man...” Bob said in a sad voice.
Bob is right. Arranged marriages are quite popular in Japan. In fact, since the Tsunami in 2011 arranged marriages have become more popular.
"I have no idea who you are but let's smile for our parents"
Rob, on the other hand, is more than happy that his beautiful Japanese bride was not promised to another guy.
Your Japanese Wife Wants a Kid with Blue Eyes
When I asked Bob and Rob about having kids with their Japanese wives, I realized why Bob was so miserable. He never wanted to have children and now that he has them, he suffers because Japan is the worst developed country for working mothers.
In other words, he has to work in a low-paying position as an English teacher while his wife takes care of the kid. He told me that he doesn’t even have money to visit his family back home.
What about Rob?
He married his Japanese mail order bride in Osaka, but he lives with her in the United States.
He has two children (none of them has blue eyes), but he’s happy because his job allows him to take care of his family.
Think about your future before you say “I do” in the present.
The Truth about the Japanese Husband and Wife Relationship
I want to end this article with a little rant from Rob:
“The Japanese husband and wife relationship is weird, but only if you are a Japanese guy. Then you are expected to work, to money, and to get another job when you’re home before 7 pm. However, if you’re a Western man and you live with her in a Western country, she adapts to the culture. You don’t need to work till death and she still does her best to take care of the family. My wife told me a million times that she’s happy that she can finally enjoy life without the judgement of her parents, her neighbors, her boss, and her coworkers. Japanese women are the best wives in the world once the fear of losing face is replaces with the will to enjoy life.”
Click here to meet sexy Japanese girls who want to enjoy life with you
Summed Up Wisdom
I know why you scrolled all the way down to the summary. You want a short version of this article. I get it. But I can’t give it to you because every question I answer and every advice I share with you in this article will help you to date Japanese girls.
If you rather want to spend your time watching Japanese movies, that’s okay. But if you’re really serious about meeting and dating the most beautiful women of Japan, you should read the whole damn article.
Anyway, here’s how I would sum up this 6800-words dating guide:
Dating Japanese girls is one big adventure and if you’re up for the ride, it’s an experience you will never forget. Just be careful that you don’t fall out of the seat.
There are definitely a lot who would love that. Approach girls wherever you are.
Any good place in Tokyo to meet Japanese cougars? Do you think some of them would be down to hook up with foreign men? I love older Japanese women(40s). A lot of them are very beautiful.
There are really curvy girls. You just have to find them.
Thanks Alex!
A more polite and formal version of “daisuki” is “daisuki desu”. “Desu” is a verb you add to make things more polite.
Hey Sebastian,
after studying and learning Japanese for a few weeks now, I found out that “Anata o hontoni aishiteimasu” is a very, very strong expression that will make most Japanese people uncomfortable. And “Anata” is the version of “you”, that is used when you are speaking to someone of lower social status.
I would recommend that, if you want to confess your love to your Japanese date, you instead use “daisuki”, which translates to ” I love you really much/a lot.”
Just wanted to let you know, so that you can maybe change it in the article to prevent possible mishaps from occuring.
Grüße,
Alexander
Hey Buddy, did you also try Japan Cupid? I had good experiences on this dating site because the women on Tinder are looking for locals, the girls on Japan Cupid are looking for foreigners.
Your article does not agree with my short experience in Japan. I spent a few days in Kyoto. I’m caucasian, tall, slim, not bad looking and well dressed. I’m a middle-aged guy, though, so maybe the age counted against me. I hammered Tinder and various other dating apps and got nothing at all. Not one match, not one expression of interest. I used exactly the same strategy that I’ve had great success with in SE Asia. I didn’t try daygame because I speak no Japanese and I didn’t see any obvious indications of interest from women.
I had a Japanese FWB for a few months (she was also middle aged) and she filled me in on the ‘sexless in Japan’ syndrome. It’s tragic. People just work too damned hard, they don’t have any time or energy left for dating, let alone romance. A wife is expected to service her husband, without much reciprocation in terms of sexual pleasuring, providing he brings home the salary.
I’m fully prepared to accept that I was just unlucky on my short holiday. BUT read this account from an expat who has lived in Japan for many years (plus the very informative comments on that post) and I think you will have a truer impression of the dating situation: I don’t know if it’s permitted to post live links here, so just Google japaneseruleof7 The Truth About Sex in Japan.
Hey Amerha,
thanks. Of course, it also applies to Asian foreigners.
Great article! I was wondering if the advice also applies to asian foreigners who want to date japanese girls.
Hey Andrew,
Caucasian guys have an obvious advantage. I wouldn’t worry so much about your hair color, your body type or if your hair is straight or curly. That doesn’t matter so much. You also don’t need to be a giant because Japanese girls tend to be very small. Of course, blue eyes and blonde hair are always a small bonus, but not required.
What appearance traits affect how Japanese women will view you?
You mentioned blue eyes, is having blue eyes desired in Japan? (I have them)
Straight/curly hair?
Height (does being tall help)
body type “twig”/normal/large frame(I have the frame of a linebacker, If I got in shape I would probably look like a bouncer)
Weight (skinny, average, heavy)
I’m looking for the love of my life agent my bride so if you’re her let even for an Asian woman to be my wife
thanks ! 🙂 (sorry if forgot)
ok 🙁
Hey Buddy,
I just checked on Japan Cupid. You can find some Japanese girls in Europe. Not many, but a few. Other than that I don’t know. Going to Japanese meetups to pick them up would be a bit creepy 😛
since i cant travel to Japan, how would you do to find a japanese girl friend in europe ?