What to Say After Sex (and What NOT)

Do you know what to say after sex?

Maybe you had quite a few girls in your bed who didn’t run away from you after you covered them in sperm. Congratulations, you are not a complete loser in the bedroom and you have probably already learned how to make a woman scream while being on top of her.

I honestly believe that your sexual experiences were great. I mean, every man enjoys sex and unless the girl you are in bed with lies there like a plank, or you find out afterwards that she has AIDS, the experience can’t be that bad.

Okay, so the sex with the last girl you went on a date with was great, but how was the atmosphere after you rolled down from her?

In case the atmosphere was awkward, irritable and uncomfortable you might have said something that she neither expected nor liked. The wrong words have the power to kill her mood within seconds and to make her regret the experience with you.

Do you really want that?

No, as the man and Global Seducer you are, it is important to you that the women you are seducing have a good time with you and don’t regret what they did.

You want to leave them with good memories and not with feelings of confusion and regret.

That’s why you have to think about what to say after sex instead of trumpeting all the ridiculous bullshit that you can think of. I know that your blood is slowly streaming back to your brain, but that’s no excuse for shocking the poor girl who was so friendly to let you have fun inside of her.

I also understand that you are afraid of the after-sex-talk but you have to understand that the fear of saying something awkward often leads to something awkward.

 

Why You Are Afraid of the After-Sex-Talk

But why are we men afraid of the after-sex-talk and why do we regard talking after we have fulfilled the number one purpose that Mother Nature designed us for as something awkward?

Why do you even bother your head about what to say after sex?

You are afraid because you do NOT have the confidence to say what you really want to say. 

Everything could be so easy. All you have to do after you had a fucking marathon with a hot girl is to behave like a normal human being. However, instead of talking to her in the same way as you would usually talk to her when you are both fully clothed, you suddenly think about all the different things you could say now, from which 99% are probably complete doodoo.

Come on, you know what to say to her.

You already said the right things before you had sex with her. Otherwise she wouldn’t have allowed you to seduce her. 

Unfortunately, the awkward silence, the fact that you just came all over her body and her pussy farts make you feel extremely uncomfortable.

 

You Don’t Want to Hurt Her

One reason why you worry about those things is because you are an honorable man and a great seducer who cares about the women he ends up in bed with. In case you don’t give a fuck about how the women you seduce feel after they leave your bedroom, you wouldn’t care about saying the right things after sex and you probably also shouldn’t be on this website.

A Global Seducer is a guy who cares about his girls and who wants to provide them with the best memories of their life.

Therefore, it is totally understandable that you don’t want to hurt her. If you are a man who doesn’t want to hurt the women you seducer you have my full respect, but at the same time you probably have problems with saying the right things after a girl swallowed your load. The reason why you have those problems is because you actually care about her and her feelings, which is great.

All you have to learn now is to stop overthinking the situation. Once you stopped worrying about saying the wrong things to her you will automatically say the right things. If you still fuck it up you will know what to say after sex once you have read this article, in which case you can try it with the next girl.

 

You Don’t Want to Lose Her

Besides not wanting to hurt her you might worry about what to say after sex because you are afraid of losing her. Okay, I have to admit that this is somehow related to the fear of hurting her, because you logically don’t want to hurt someone who you want to keep in your life, even though you hopefully have the decency to also not hurt a girl who you want to get rid of.

Sounds confusing?

Maybe, but that doesn’t change the fact that you sometimes fall for a girl who you have a one night stand with.

 

I also had sex with my current girlfriend on the first date and boom…for some reason I wanted to spend another night with her and in her.

Those things happen and the feeling of not wanting to lose a girl you ended up in bed with, even if it was the first time you tasted her delicious pussy juice, is definitely a reason why you worry about saying the right thing after you pounded her for hours.

 

You Want to Get Rid of Her

Let’s be honest. Sometimes you simply don’t want to see the girl from last night again. Maybe she didn’t want to suck your dick. Maybe she was so uptight that she didn’t want to take of her jacket during sex. Maybe the sex was great but her vagina smelled like a wet dog….ouch.

In this case you probably don’t worry so much about saying the right thing.

I mean, if you really want her to leave you don’t care if she is upset because you tell her that you have to puke when you think about going down on her.

In this case you probably worry about saying things that convey the impression that she is the love of your life and that you want to stay together with her to the bitter end. All you can think of is which words you have to use in order to get rid of her as fast as you can.

 

I know, or at least I hope, that you will have more positive sexual experiences than negative ones. That’s why I am pretty sure that you are more interested in learning what to say after sex instead of what not to say, so that you will see her again and won’t hurt her feelings.

If this is true you can simply regard the following examples of what not to say after sex as boundaries that you shouldn’t cross, if you really want to see her again. If you, however, decide that it was a mistake to pick up Jabba the Hutt in a moment of weakness and uncontrollable horniness, you can confidently say all the weird things that I am going to share with you right now.

Don’t worry, after I have tortured you with all the ridiculous things that you should NOT say to a woman after sex, we are going to look at all the magic sentences that will make her heart thump and her pussy wet again.

 

What NOT to Say After Sex

I already told you that telling the girl you just had a little sexy time with that going down on her was worse than licking the deck of a fishing cutter is not the best way to keep her. Even if you would want to get rid of her that would be way too mean.

Remember, you still want to be one of the best memories she will ever have.

What you don’t want is to traumatize her and to be responsible for never-ending nightmares and overpriced bills from her shrink.

That’s why you should look at the following examples of what not to say after sex with humor. Only use the sentences that won’t destroy her self-esteem when you try to get rid of her. I don’t want her to end up with a broken heart and I also don’t want you to end up with a broken dick.

 

I am so Sorry

One of the worst things you can say after you had sex with a girl is that you are sorry for what you did. Why the hell would any guy on this planet say that?

Well, I really thought about whether or not I should put myself in this awkward position but I promised myself that I will always be honest to you. The only guy I know who has ever been stupid enough to say “I am so sorry” right after he slept with a girl is…

…a guy called Sebastian Harris.

I once dated a girl who was still a virgin and who promised herself to keep her virginity until she gets married. In every other situation I would have accepted her decision and would have left her alone but there was something about this girl (maybe it was her ass) that forced me to use all my seduction skills to seduce her.

Eventually, we ended up in bed and her intention to stay a virgin for the next ten years changed to the intention to lose her virginity within the next couple of seconds. Now you might think that I only said “I am so sorry” because she was crying next to me after I took her virginity. Well, that’s not what happened.

She actually smiled and kept telling me that everything is okay. Nevertheless, I still felt sorry because I ignored her wish to stay a virgin. Through my never-ending apologies I ruined the mood and forced her to predestine another teacher for her second time.

 

How Was I?

In case you have ever seen a romantic comedy movie with a sex scene or at least a scene that implies sexual actions, you have heard in nearly 50% of the movies the question “how was I?”.  If you are worrying about what to say after sex because you want to keep the girl you slept with, you should delete this question from your vocabulary.

 

The reason why you should never say that to a woman is not because it is a particularly bad question. I mean, there is basically nothing wrong with asking if she enjoyed having you on top of her or not. The only problem is that this sentence is so stereotypical and has only been used by loser characters in movies, that you will automatically sound ridiculous and desperate when you ask it.

In addition to that, this question implies that you are insecure about the skills of your little/big friend down there and that you seek her approval. Men, who seek approval from a woman, no matter if it is because of his lovemaking skills or his ability to juggle, are always needy.

 

I Usually Last Longer

Another classic thing that you shouldn’t say to a woman after sex is the desperate sentence “I normally last longer.” If you did a great job during foreplay most women will neither realize nor care about the fact that you only lasted three minutes. Of course they will suddenly realize it once you address it.

Telling a woman that you had sex with for the first time that you normally last longer is the same as if you would tell a guy who you meet for the first time that you normally wear glasses.

Neither the guy you met nor the girl you banged care about what you said.

She can’t believe you because she never had sex with you before. Therefore she doesn’t know if you usually last longer or not. You can say this sentence if you want to get rid of her but if you want to see her again you should better prove it to her in the second round.

 

Do You Take the Pill?

I already wrote an article about why condoms are holy for every seducer. In this article I made the controversial but true assertion that women will have sex without a condom, as soon as they reach the critical point of horniness.

In case you somehow forgot to use a condom and you then ask her afterwards if she takes the pill, you are a bit too late.

“Do you take the pill?” is a very good question, but only if you ask her before you have sex and not afterwards.

 

In case you wonder what to say after sex in order to get rid of her, you should never see yourself in the position to ask her this question. You might never get rid of her after you put a baby in her belly.

 

Shit, the Condom Broke

Up until now I have never been careless enough to ask a girl if she takes the pill after I already came inside her, but I experienced it quite a few times (way too many times), that I had to scream “shit, the condom broke.”

 

I was fortunate enough that the girls I had those scary experiences with either took the pill or I didn’t ejaculated inside them. Nevertheless, those situations are always good for a heart attack. I am really good at breaking condoms and I only know one brand that doesn’t break. I might advertise for them in the future. They are really incredible.

However that be, I know that you can’t always control whether or not you have to say “shit, the condom broke” but I really hope for you that you won’t have to say it as often as I had to say it in the past two years.

 

Get the Fuck Out of Here

Do you want to know what not to say after sex?

“Get the fuck out of here!”

 

No matter if you formulate it this way or in a much politer way by asking her if she wants to go now, you are still making her feel bad when you ask her to leave right after you banged her. I understand that there are some women who you want to get rid of as fast as you can, but telling her to fuck off isn’t consistent with the intention to be the best memory she ever had.

The only thing you communicate to her by saying this is that the experience with her sucked and that she is such a horrible person that you regret what you did. It is your decision if you say stuff like that to women who opened their heart and their vaginas for you. I wouldn’t do it.

 

What Was Your Name Again?

Who is so oblivious that he can’t even remember the name of the girl he just had sex with?

I am.

In my defense I have to say that the girl I seduced had a name that was unpronounceable for a guy who wasn’t born and raised in Asia. If her name would have been Laura or Sarah I wouldn’t have made that gaffe.

The problem was that her name was neither Laura nor Sarah but…shit I forgot it. The even bigger problem was that she was extremely huffy and the fact that I couldn’t remember her name seemed to be terrible for her.

From this experience I can only entrust you to remember the names of the girls you bang. This will save you a lot of trouble.

 

If I were You I Would Go to The Doctor Now

In case you worry about what to say after sex, because you don’t want to scare the next girl you end up in bed with away, you shouldn’t make the same joke as I once made.

I personally believe that humor doesn’t have to stay out of the bedroom, but I also made the experience that some women see this different.

I once said to a girl right after I had sex with her that if I were her, I would go to the doctor right now.

Okay, I admit that I should have said it with a less serious facial expression, but I didn’t expect her to freak out like that.

In this moment she probably thought that she caught herpes, AIDS and tripper altogether. Thankfully, I could calm her after a couple of minutes after I told her ten times that it was just a joke.

This experience taught me that saying that you are a walking STD-transmitter is something that you shouldn’t say after sex.

In case you still haven’t enough after my really bad STD joke, the following video will give you the rest:

 

What to Say After Sex

Now that you know what you shouldn’t say after you banged the shit out of a girl, unless you want to get rid of her or get a high heel in your balls, it is time to have a look at what to say after sex, if you want to keep her.

The following examples are 100% practical and can be directly put in practice with the next girl who jumps in bed with you. I hope you have a chance to test the following sentences today.

 

You Are Beautiful

Sometimes the simplest words have the most impact. What is the number one thing that every woman wants to hear when she looks you in the eyes after you had a passionate session of touching, liking, biting and fucking?

“You are beautiful!”

That’s all you need to say in this situation.

In case you want to know the level of insecurity that a woman has when she lies next to you completely naked, you just have to imagine yourself with scars all over your body (I know how that feels). Then multiply your own insecurity in this situation with 100.

When it comes to their bodies women are extremely insecure. The counterintuitive truth is that the more beautiful the girl who is lying next to you is, the higher is the chance that she is insecure. All she needs in order to trust you and to feel comfortable in your bed and in your arms is to hear that she is beautiful.

 

Are You Hungry?

If you worry about what to say after sex and you search for something completely natural that won’t scare her away, you can simply ask her if she is hungry. At first glance that might sound like the most uncreative and ridiculous thing you could possibly say, but it actually makes a lot of sense.

Unless you had the most boring vanilla sex in the history of humanity you burned a lot of calories. By asking her if she is hungry you not only show that you are attentive and that you care about her, you also communicate that you don’t plan to get rid of her.

In case you don’t want to lose her, a simple question like “are you hungry?” can lead to a conversation in a restaurant that makes her fall for you.

 

Come Here

What do we men want after we had sex? We want to sleep and if we can’t sleep we want at least enough space to recover our breath.

What do women want after they had sex? They want to snuggle up to us and hug us as tight as they can.

What should you do after you had sex with a woman if you want to keep her? You should ignore your desire to have more space and allow her to do what she wants to do so badly.

A simple “come here” can communicate all the trust, protection and empathy that a woman needs and wants in such a vulnerable situation.

 

Let’s Take a Shower

In case you want to make her addicted to you, heating things up again is always a good idea.

How about getting dirty again under the pretext of getting clean?

 

When you don’t know what to say after sex and you feel horny again, you should ask her to take a shower with you. This intimate experience not only gives you the chance to wash her…and to fuck her again.

Taking a shower is always good to relive the passion and to strengthen the bond.

 

I am so Tired

Admitting that you are tired after you banged her in every imaginable position is a huge compliment. Believe it or not but we men are not the only ones who want to hear that we have done a great job in the bedroom.

Especially when a woman just slept with you for the first time she wants to know that you are happy, satisfied and exhausted. Telling her that you don’t feel tired at all would be the same as if you would tell her that the sex was boring and tiring.

Telling a woman that you are satisfied and exhausted is one of the biggest compliments you can give her. This will motivate her to fuck you even better the next time.

 

I Thought You Were a Good Girl  

For most women it is extremely important to maintain their good girl image…at least in public.

Things are a little bit different once she already showed you her naughty and sexual side. She knows that you don’t regard her as a good girl anymore and right after she swallowed your potential babies she gets turned on by being seen as the bad girl.

 

However, women always feel safe and secure when they are able to successfully maintain the good girl image in public.

Why don’t you give her this feeling of safety and security by telling her that you thought she was a good girl?

Say it with a smile and she will feel even more secure, because she can be sure that you allow her to live out her naughty side while you also respect her decent side.

 

I Won’t Kiss and Tell

I already said that women tend to be insecure and vulnerable after they had sex with a man they never slept with before. Besides not being seen as physically attractive they have one fear that is even bigger.

Remember that I said that women are willing to do everything to maintain their good girl image in public?

After they had sex with you for the first time they don’t know whether you are a guy who respects this will, or a guy who does everything to destroy her public image. The biggest fear that women have is to be seen as sluts and one sure way to make their nightmares come true is by kissing and telling.

Make clear that you are a guy who lives by the “don’t kiss and tell” rule and that she doesn’t have to be afraid of losing her good girl image. Once she trusts you enough to know that you won’t destroy her good girl image, she will be more than ready to live out her naughty side with you.

 

I Would Like to See you Again

Telling a woman who you want to see again that you actually want to see her again can either be communicated in a needy or an authentic and confident way. Depending on how you say it, you are either turning her on or off.

You actually have to let her know if you want to see her again. Otherwise, she doesn’t know where she stands with you.

Some women want to see you again and others don’t. That’s part of the game. However, if you tell her your feelings in a confident and honest way, chances are high that she wants to spend another night with you.

How would you feel if every woman you seduce wanted to see (and sleep with you) again? 

Make it reality today…

 

Summed Up Wisdom

Why should you even care about saying the right things after you slept with a girl? You either don’t want to loser her, or you want to get rid of her. In both cases I hope that you don’t want to hurt her. Even if you want to get rid of a girl, you don’t have to tell her to fuck off. Forgetting her name or asking her the stereotypical question “how was I?” should be enough to get rid of her without hurting her feelings.

In case you want to keep the woman you spent the night with you should think carefully about what to say after sex. Telling her that you are beautiful, inviting her to snuggle up to you and telling her to take a shower are all things that can make her comfortable in your bed and in your arms. If you then tell her that you don’t kiss and tell and that you would like to see her again, she is yours.