How to Seduce and Date a MILF Next Door

I am 26, I look like 16 and the oldest woman I ever seduced was 36. She had a child. Let’s talk about how to date a MILF.

I’ve never been a MILF Hunter. I’ve never been particularly interested in dating women who have one, two, three or twelve children. It just happened. Heck, I didn’t even know that she had a child until she showed me pictures of that little rascal.

We didn’t end up in a relationship, but the days and especially the night we spent together were quite educational. The time with her showed me how little I knew about dating women with children and how beautiful it can be.

All over the internet you see posts that contain the 10 reasons why you should never date a single mom and the 10 reasons why single moms don’t deserve love…yada yada yada. To be honest, unless you fall for a gold-digging woman who was looking for a provider when you met her, all these fears are unreasonable.

Dating a MILF can be beautiful.

Unfortunately, most men think that the process of seducing and dating a woman who already has a child is the same as being the leading actor in a MILF porn production with a big-breasted mom named Stella.

The Truth About Dating a Milf That Everyone is Hiding From You

“MILF’s are insatiable sex machines who want to be your fuck toy. All they want is sex. They NEVER want a relationship.”

Basically, that’s the internet’s opinion of single women who have children. Classy, classy, I must say that. All over the internet you find articles like this one that state that these women don’t want relationships. As if it was written in stone that MILFS are horny freaks who have no emotional needs.

Please don’t get me wrong. There are definitely older women with children out there who don’t want a relationship right now, because they just dumped their cheating hubby. Nevertheless, I think that turning every beautiful single mother on earth into this weird MILF stereotype is ridiculous.

Hell, when I wrote my article about dating older women, I had the same assumptions. Then I talked to some older women. Some of them had children, some of them hadn’t. But not all of them needed a vomit bag whenever a guy mentions the word relationship.

MILFs are not the sexually insatiable fuck toys that you see on your favorite porn site.

They are normal women for fuck’s sake. Some want just sex, others want a relationship. Oh, and most of them are pretty mature, down-to-earth and nurturing. I guess that’s what happens when you trade catching Pokémon on your smartphone for caring for a small human being.

Yes, most single moms crave for male attention and are sexually frustrated. That’s a normal concomitant of being a lonely female over 30. Just don’t look at her in the same way as you look at the MILFs in your favorite porn movies. Treat her like a human being goddammit.

The Milfs You Want to Date (and Avoid)

There are MILFs you want to date and there are MILFs you don’t want to date. Like I said, not every woman who has given birth to a child wants to jump in bed with you. And even if she wants to jump in bed with you, you might be better off saying no.

“What? How can you say that?”

Well, let’s just say that I once met a slightly older woman who was more than ready to jump in bed with me. The only problem was that her husband would have been more than ready to put a knife in me if he had found out.

Avoid: The Married and the Newly Widowed MILF

There are two types of hot moms that you shouldn’t date. Sometimes your physical health and her emotional health are more important than fulfilling your MILF fantasy.

I’ll explain.

The first type of woman that you should avoid like the plague is the one who is still married.

Obviously, she is unhappy in her marriage. That’s why she wants to jump in bed with you. She wants to feel desired by a young man like you. Maybe she wants it because she hasn’t had sex in months. Maybe she wants it because her husband is busy banging his secretary.

It doesn’t matter. All that matters is that you will get in trouble as soon as her panties reach the floor. Believe me, you neither want to destroy a relationship, nor do you want three broken ribs. Just think about the consequences if her husband looks like this:

Oh, and avoid the newly widowed women.

Most of them are not emotionally ready, even though the emotional void in their heart tells them that they are. Unless you are ready for an emotional hell-ride, you should give her the time she really needs.

Go For: the Separated or Divorced Milf

Then there are the MILFs that you can seduce and date without getting beaten up and fragmented. These women are already separated from their boyfriends or divorced from their husbands.

They are alone and the last thing they want is to stay alone.

Their bed hasn’t seen a man in months or even years and while they break one vibrator every week, their lingerie is covered in spider webs. They miss the cuddling, the miss the kissing and they miss the…you know what I mean.

They are ready for a young man like you.

Where to Meet the MILF of Your Dreams

Nope, you won’t meet her in a club on Friday night. Oh, and in case you actually meet her in a club on Friday night, she might not be the right girl for you. She should be with her kid and not sipping Martinis.

Skip the clubs, skip the bars and skip all the other unfunny places where people act weird and get shitfaced. Mommies are, or at least should be, responsible and mature enough to trade overpriced cocktails for healthy food.

Now it’s on you if you continue to spend ten bucks on a shitty drink in the local club or if you go to Cougar Dating Sites to meet these women.

Meet Her Where the Mommies Are

Hot mommies are everywhere. They are in the cinema watching the new Ice Age with their kids. They are in the supermarket shopping for toys, diapers and healthy food. They are in bookstores searching for books that could help their rebellious son to pass the sixth grade. They are in a park playing with their children.

That’s where beautiful women with children hang out. Not the club, not the bar.

Just think about all the places where you would go if you had children. Go there.

Okay, just avoid Toys”R”Us. Hitting on single women in a toyshop is kind of creepy. Oh, and avoid the playground, unless it’s one that’s linked to a park. You don’t want to end up on the sex offenders list, just because granny Agnes called the police.

Meet Her on a Milf Online Dating Site

I have good news and bad news for you.

The good news is that I love to be your crash test dummy and test all kinds of dating services for you. I really enjoy it.

The bad news is that I couldn’t find a single MILF online dating site that did not look like a scam.

I mean, I looked on every corner of the internet, but all you see on these sites are tits of women who look exactly like famous pornstars from the 80s. What a coincidence.

I am thinking of two online dating sites that could be the paradise for young men looking for mature women with children, but I haven’t had the time to properly test them. And I really don’t want to recommend a shitty online dating site to you.

I’ll updated this post as soon as I have run enough tests and found a MILF online dating site that deserves a recommendation.

How to Approach a Milf (and How NOT to)

How do you actually approach a MILF?

Watch this video and you will see how:

No seriously. He does a pretty good job. And he even approached a pretty hot mama on the playground in the creepiest way possible and he still gets her number.

Vitaly does it in a cheeky way and you can definitely use some of his cheeky lines during your interactions with single women who have children.

Boldness and cheekiness are the best friends of a seducer.

But what do you do when you are not a famous YouTube comedian and being cheeky is as difficult for you as speaking Cantonese?

Then you are ready for the ultimate MILF approach that works every goddamn time. But first we are going to have a look at the one approach that you absolutely have to avoid.

Avoid: The Cute Child Approach

I know that you don’t mean it this way when you say it. You just want to be nice, not creepy. Unfortunately, it’s the creepiest thing you can possibly do.

“You have such a cute child!”

Just put yourself in her shoes. She gets paranoid whenever she leaves her child unattended for more than five seconds. She has already watched more than a dozen child abduction movies. The thought of some pervert getting close to her kid keeps her awake at night.

And now you approach her by telling her that she has a really cute child.

Of course she gets scared. She doesn’t know that you are a nice guy who wants to meet her. The only things she can think of are the movies she watched and the horror stories she heard from other mothers. Her mother radar screams “alarm, alarm”.

Don’t EVER use The Cute Child Approach!

Do: The Lucky Husband Approach

Instead, use The Lucky Husband Approach. This approach is not creepy and ten times more effective. Just walk up to her with a friendly smile and tell her something like this:

“Excuse me. I know that you are busy playing with your kid, but I just had to come over and tell you that you look absolutely stunning. Your husband is a very lucky man.”

What if she is happily married and has no interest? She will thank you for the compliment and tell you that her husband is just around the corner. Even if her husband stands right next to you, he will take it as a compliment…at least unless he is an aggressive moron.

What if she is happily divorced and wants to get to know you? She will let you know that she is not married or that she doesn’t have a boyfriend. Now you know that you already have one foot in the door.

How to Attract a MILF

The first rule of attracting MILFs:

Don’t be one of these pathetic MILF Hunters who get so excited by the thought of seducing a mom they’d like to fuck that they blow their load before the first kiss.

Relax, calm down. You are not in a porn movie.

The last thing she wants is to go on a date with an overly nervous young man who thinks that she is a toy and not a human being. Just don’t act crazy and remember that you are talking to a normal woman.

Oh, and don’t be her second child…

Remember that She Already Has a Child

She already has a child and if she’s a woman in her forties, her child might be around the age of 16. Unless she has some really weird fetish, she doesn’t want to hop in bed with a man who has the same emotional maturity than her teenage son.

Yes, these women want young men who can challenge them in the bedroom, but they don’t want to date immature little boys. That’s something that many men mix up.

Young is not the same as immature.

Get that into your head before you approach a MILF with a terrible fart joke that you read in the latest Donald Duck magazine.

Make Clear that You are Not joking

Now that you have traded your Minions shirt for a Hugo Boss shirt, it’s time to do one more thing. It’s time to tell her that you are not joking. Yes, you already did that during the approach…at least ten times.

Do it again. Don’t stop until she believes you.

Women who are over 30 AND who have a child are mature and realistic. They know that 99% of men would rather date a younger woman who doesn’t have children. That’s a fact and she knows that.

That’s why you will hear the following questions over and over again:

“Why don’t you talk to a woman who’s the same age as you?”

“There are so many beautiful young women. Why do you want ME?”

Make sure that you have a good answer. And no, saying that you are a MILF hunter on a mission is not a good answer.

How to Seduce a MILF

Are you ready for the final stage?

You approached her without landing in jail for attempted child abduction. You attracted her by being a man and not a little boy and you made clear to her that you prefer an experienced woman like her over an 18-year old social media addicted party chick.

You are ready for the final round. You are ready for the seduction. Of course, she’s a woman like any other woman. She has the same sexual and emotional needs. However, it’s still a bit different.

Let me show you just how different it is to seduce a MILF.

Give Sexual Compliments

I am a big fan of sexual escalation…the faster the better. But sometimes you have to be careful. Some women are so inexperienced that a sexual compliment would freak them out. Now you can forget about being too cautious. That’s the beauty of seducing a MILF.

She is a sexually experienced woman. She knows exactly what she wants.

I mean, we both know that her child wasn’t delivered by a stork.

Boring and sexless relationship? No thanks. She had that with her ex-husband and she doesn’t want to make the same mistake twice. She might want a relationship with you at some point, but for now she wants to be desired.

Being desired…she hasn’t felt this feeling in a long time. She wants it. She craves it. Show her that you desire her and she will fulfill your desires.

Kiss Her Insecurities Away

You made clear to her that you want her and not some party-addicted teenage girl, right?

Awesome, but that doesn’t mean that she is free from insecurities. She still has them. Remember, older women who carried a baby for 9 months know that their body can’t compete with a 19-year old college girl.

She knows that her skin is not as soft and that her belly is not that flat anymore. She knows it and she probably feels insecure about it. It’s your job to make sure that she feels comfortable with you. And being comfortable is the opposite of feeling insecure.

Tell her how beautiful she is. Admire her body when she reveals it to you. Kiss her insecurities away.

Make her feel beautiful, sexy and desirable.

Give her the feelings that her ex-husband never gave her and she will give you what she never gave him.

How to Date a Milf

Now you know how to meet, attract and seduce the MILF of your dreams. You are ready to go to the park and pick up a beautiful mommy who teaches you one or two tricks in the bedroom…and maybe even how to eat properly.

But maybe you want more than being a sexual apprentice of an experienced woman.

What if the connection is so strong and the attraction so intense that you want to be with her every second of the day?

Well, despite the popular belief that I already picked to pieces at the beginning of this article, some beautiful mommies dream about a relationship with a younger guy.

It’s not easy and it’s not common, but it’s not impossible. But with the right rules it can work beautifully.

Not sleeping with her 18-year old daughter is rule number one. But there are a few more rules that make a relationship with a MILF much more enjoyable. Let’s have a look at them.

Try to Get Along With Her Kids

This is crucial. I spoke to two women who had children and who dated younger men and in both cases the relationship failed, because the men they dated didn’t get along with the kids. And yes, this is the main reason why these relationships are so hard.

I am 26 and if I imagine myself being in a relationship with a woman who has a teenage kid, I don’t see happy family photos. I see fights, I see stress and to be completely honest, I see me being too immature to handle the situation.

Do you want to be in a relationship with an older woman who has a child?

You have my full respect, but I won’t lie to you. It won’t be easy and you have to do everything in your power to get along with her child or children.

Your relationship to her kids defines your relationship with her.

But hey, maybe you do an amazing job, just like Joe.

Don’t Act Like the Father of Her Kids

Not getting along with her kids is the one extreme. Pretending to be their father is the other. Okay, there might come the time when she wants you to be a father to her children and there might even come the time when her child wants you as a father figure (remember Joe?).

However, that’s not during the first few days and probably also not during the first few weeks.

You are not the father, so don’t act as if you were.

She might love you like she never loved someone before, but that doesn’t give you the right to raise her child. You are the boyfriend. You are not the father. These are two completely different rules. It’s not your job to scream at her son because he ran into the television while playing Pokémon Go.

Develop and Interest For Her Interests

I don’t know how old you are, but due to your interest in dating MILFS, I assume that the woman you are looking for is older than you. Maybe you are a member of the Generation Y and she is a member of the Generation X.

When she was young, Britney Spears was running around like an innocent school girl, claiming that she was a holy virgin. Now that you are young, Britney Spears can be considered a MILF as well. Heck, just think about Christina Aguilera and Jennifer Lopez and all the other hot MILFs in the music business (man, I am old).

What I am trying to say is this:

A relationship with a MILF can be a clash of cultures. You have been raised with different music, different films and different art. One way to improve your relationship is to develop an interest for her interests. You don’t have to love her music, but you should at least care about why she loves it.

Allow Her to Give You Guidance to Maturity

One beautiful part of being in a relationship with a MILF, at least when I can trust the young fella who told me this, is that the woman you are dating can give you guidance to maturity. Yes, I approach random couples and ask them about their relationship (that’s another story) and yes, that’s how he expressed it.

Guidance to maturity…

When I asked further, he explained it to me like this:

“Since I am together with my girlfriend, who is five years older than me and has a seven year-old daughter, I grew a lot as a man. When I met her I never thought that I could handle it. I was overwhelmed. Then I learned and developed. I grew with the challenge.”

Mhh…maybe I should leave my girlfriend for a single mommy to become more mature (just kidding honey).

Meet the Biological Father

Okay, now you are probably thinking that I lost my mind. Well, not quite.

“Why the hell should I meet the biological father?”

You might ask yourself this question right now. I will give you an answer. Just bear in mind that this final step only applies to you, if you are really serious about the relationship and if you can tick both boxes:

A: You think about marrying this woman.

B: You love her child as if it was your own.

Then, and only then do I recommend that you meet the biological father of her child. Listen, I know that this is a huge step and you might not see the necessity right now. But think about it.

He will always be a part of her life and her child’s life.

If you get along with the ex-cock of the roost, your hen and her hatchling will be a lot happier.

You will be their king of the roost.

Come on king. Now download your copy of Rise of the Phoenix. 

Summed Up Wisdom

Learning how to seduce and date a MILF is not as easy as picking up a party girl at 3 am from a shady club. But it’s definitely worth it. Once you understand the truth about dating MILFs and that you should better avoid the newly widowed and still married women, you can start your adventure.

Go to the places where older women with children go to and behave like a mature man, not like the little boy she already has at home. Make clear that you are not joking and make her feel comfortable around you.

Make her experience what it really means to be desired. She craves this feeling. Give it to her and she will do anything to give you the same feeling. And depending on how far you want to take it, the relationship with her kids and the biological father might be something to think about.