"Do black girls like white men?"
I am a white guy and some black girls take my breath away.
UPDATE 23.07.2016: At the end of this article (right before the summed up wisdom) you can find a case study of one of my readers who found the black woman of his dreams. Make sure to check it out!
And no, just because I am also into Asian girls doesn’t mean that I despise black women. During the year that I spent studying in the UK I dated two extremely gorgeous dark-skinned women.
I like their beautiful brown skin, their hearty smile and to be completely honest, I love how their skin smells like vanilla.
It is okay for me if you want to call me a weirdo for saying that black girls smell like vanilla, but it is not okay if you are a white guy who is totally into black girls and you have never dated one because you are convinced that they don’t like you.
Unfortunately, a lot of white men believe this lie and according to Google more than 1000 desperate white guys ask the one question that, if answered correctly, can change their dating life forever…
Short Disclaimer: Before I get ignorant racist comments I want to say that I support white guys who want to date outside their race in the same way as black guys who want to date outside their race. However, I am white and that’s why I write this article from my point of view. In case you are a black guy and you want to write about black men dating white women, feel free to contact me and send me your article. I’d be happy to publish it.
Do Black Girls Like White Men?
The short answer is:
Yes, a lot of black girls like white men.
I can’t even tell you how many dark-skinned women I have met who were totally into white guys. In case you don’t believe me, I want you to switch on your computer, laptop or tablet and type “interracial celebrity couples” into Google.
What you will find are women like the actress Tara Wilson who is married to a white guy. You will find actress Zoe Saldana who is married to a white guy. You will find Tina Turner who is married to a white guy who has the same weird accent as I have.
After you have looked through countless celebrity gossip websites you can head over to Facebook. What you will find is the Black Women Who Love White Men Period Facebook Group.
Yes, this Facebook group has more than 30.000 members and countless pictures of happy black girls with their white boyfriends or husbands. In case you are still not convinced that black girls actually like white guys, you can look through popular forums.
What you will find there are frustrated, confused and clueless black girls who ask themselves the following question:
Oh, and of course you will also find a lot of entries from Caucasian guys who ask themselves the important question that I want to answer in this article:
The proof is there.
Facebook groups with over 30.000 active members, beautiful African American celebrities who date a white guy, desperate forum members who ask themselves why they can’t find a white guy AND countless white guys who ask Google “do black girls like white men?” because they want to know if they have a chance with the dark-skinned woman of their dreams.
So why is it then that white men are the least likely to marry someone outside their own race, especially when it comes to marrying black girls?
Why is it then that black female white male couples are still so rare, even though both races are obviously attracted to each other?
Well, I can only speak from my own experience.
During the time I dated black girls I learned that many of them are attracted to white guys. Through conversations with the female friends of the girls I dated I also found out that many of them secretly fantasized about dating a white guy.
However, I also found out why there are still so many white guys who ask themselves “do black girls like white men?” while they gaze a after a black girl who would never admit who she is really attracted to.
The Misconceptions about Black Girls Who Like White Men
There are in fact reasons why black girls write about how much they love white guys in anonymous forums and Facebook groups, but why only a handful of them are brave enough to upload a picture with their white boyfriend.
One of those reasons are the misconceptions that our society has about black girls who decide to date white guys. Unfortunately, a lot of beautiful black women have been conditioned by those lies and started to believe them.
You should be proud of yourself for ignoring the misconceptions and for going for what you really want.
A lot of the misconceptions that I am going to talk about in the following lines can also be directly used to answer the question “do white men like black girls?” but that’s fuel for another article.
Let’s have a look at why there are still so many white guys who wonder if they have a chance with black girls, while the African girls who are secretly into them are too shy to even look at them.
They Hate to Be Black
One of the biggest misconceptions about black girls who are into white guys is that they all hate themselves.
They hate to be black. That’s why they don’t date a black man. They think they are ugly. That’s why they try to increase their self-confidence by dating a white guy. They don’t want their children to be dark-skinned. That’s why they would do everything to end up marrying a white guy.
Whenever I dated a black girl I heard those accusations.
You might think that my white friends warned me from ending up in a relationship with a black girl by saying those things, but the shocking truth (at least shocking for me) was that HER friends said those things.
Even though I might risk getting one or two hate comments by saying the truth, I want to say it anyway:
Whenever someone told me that the girl I dated was only together with me because she hated herself and her race, it was another black girl who said that, sometimes even close friends. If my friends would say such things behind my back I would look out for new friends.
Anyway, I addressed this topic and eventually found out that none of the black girls I was dating hated themselves or the color of their skin. Nevertheless, I also discovered the sad truth that there are in fact some black women who hate the color of their skin:
Click here if you are ready to tell thousands of black girls that you love the color of their skin
Thankfully, the majority of black girls, at least the ones I met in the UK, embraced their color. The only thing they really hated was the label that other black people would give them as soon as they would date outside of their race.
They Betray Their Own Race
“There must be something wrong about her. Why isn’t she dating a black man? There are so many good-looking black men and she is holding the hand of this white bread. It’s a shame.”
In case you have ever dated a black girl and you were standing right next to two old black men who enjoy gossiping about you, you have probably already heard the words I just shared with you.
I don’t know why but for some reason a lot of people, especially old black people, tend to believe that all black women must naturally be attracted to black guys and ONLY black guys. Dating someone outside of their race seems to be the proof that something is wrong with her.
In the same way as white guys who date Asian women are labeled as creepy sex tourists, black women who date white guys are seen as race traitors who have some serious mental issues.
We live in a crazy world.
They Want to Brag About Dating a White Guy
Another popular misconception about dark-skinned ladies who decide to date a white bread like me is that they just do it because they want to brag about dating a white guy. I know that this misconception is contradictory to the above mentioned allegations, but that doesn’t mean that it isn’t an issue.
In the same way as some people believe that white guys only date outside of their race because they want to get the “exotic girl” high five from their buddies, it is believed that black girls hunt white guys as a trophy.
While this might be true for some girls (It would be great if a black lady would shine some light on this in the comments), it is definitely not true for all of them. From ten women who date a white guy their might be one who does it because she wants to be the first in her social circle who has a white boyfriend.
Of course that’s enough to generalize it…
They Have a Slave Fetish
Now we come to the one misconception that, in my experience, is the most painful allegation that a black girl who dates a white guy has to survive.
yes, these words can hurt
I still remember the day when one so-called friend of the girl I was dating made her cry by asking her one brutal question.
“You like to be a slave to your master, right?”
It was a black guy who said that, but I am pretty sure that there are also a lot of white guys who would say stuff like that.
These are the kind of sentences that have the power to destroy a beautiful relationship.
These are the words that make black girls all over the world think twice before they date a white guy, even though that’s what they want to do.
How Her Family Tries to Convince Her to Not Like You
Now you know how our society influences black girls to answer the questions “do you like white men?” with “umm, nah, not really. That would be weird”.
The problem is that the society we live in is not the only force that prevents beautiful dark-skinned women from admitting their sexual preferences. Don’t think that society is the worst, before you have met her parents.
I was fortunate enough to meet the parents of both black girls I dated.
The parents of girl number one welcomed me with open arms. They had absolutely no problem with the color of my skin.
When I met the parents of the second black girl I dated, things looked a bit different. Her father opened the door, looked at me with despite and I was treated like shit. Eventually, her family was a major reason why the relationship failed.
I could only hear fractions of the debate she had with her father, but here were the two most painful sentences I can remember:
“You are a disgrace to our family!”
Yes, that’s exactly what he said to his daughter.
Just imagine if you would come home with a black girlfriend and your father would tell you that you are a disgrace to the family, that he will throw you out if you don’t break up with her and that you are not his son anymore.
I am pretty sure that your motivation to openly admit that you are into black girls will be as low as it has ever been. The same was true for the girl I was dating.
We lost contact, but I am pretty sure that she would tell any white guy who would ask her if she likes white men, that she never has and never will.
“That’s Not What Martin Luther King Died For!”
Speaking of the race traitor thing…
I was completely speechless when I heard this sentence. Her dad actually said “that’s not what Martin Luther King died for”. Despite the proven fact that Martin Luther King didn’t say anything against interracial relationships, this statement shows how narrow-minded people, no matter if black or white, still are.
I don’t say that you should forget what happened in the past.
All I ask for is to move on and to embrace the fact that interracial dating is in fact legal, instead of taking one step back by condemning it.
How She Convinces Herself Not to Like You
As if the misconceptions that our society still propagates and her family members weren’t enough, the answer to the question “do black women like white guys?” is also accompanied by a lot of worries and anxieties that she has to battle with.
On the one hand, a lot of those anxieties and worries are based on the social conditioning and the family beliefs that she has been exposed to. On the other hand, some of those anxieties are closely related to her own negative experiences and the negative experiences that other black girls made.
She Worries About What Her Friends and Family Would Think
Now that you have read my experience with the dad who called his daughter a disgrace to his family, you hopefully understand why a lot of black women are worried about what her family thinks.
“Will they accept him?”
“Will they like him?”
“Will they still respect me?”
These are all questions that a dark-skinned girl who just thinks about dating a white guy asks herself. Just imagine the fear, the worries and the crippling anxieties a woman who knows that her parents are extremely narrow-minded and ignorant when it comes to interracial dating has to deal with.
It is really hard to admit something when the peer pressure and the family pressure are too high. At the same time it is very easy to deny something in order to be liked by your friends and family.
She Believes that White Men Don’t Like Black Girls
The uncomfortable truth that a lot of black girls I talked with about this issue confirmed is that many dark-skinned women don’t think that any white man would be attracted to them. Even though they secretly dream about being in a relationship with a white guy, they would never give them any signs of attraction, because they think that they have no chance.
Yes, it is messed up. While thousands of white guys ask themselves whether or not the black ladies they are so into like them, the same black women think that no white guy would ever consider dating them.
I made the experience that the darker the skin of the girl was, the more she was convinced that no white man would be attracted to her.
I actually talked to one extremely dark-skinned and at the same time incredibly beautiful woman who thought that white men are disgusted by the color of her skin.
In case you are a guy who loves dark-skinned girls with uncontrollable curly hair, the following video and the encouraging comments show that you are not the only one:
Unfortunately, a lot of dark-skinned girls still believe that white men look at them with disgust. This makes it impossible for them to ever admit that they like white men.
It is your job as a white guy who is into black women to change this. Tell the dark-skinned beauties you see that they are indeed beautiful.
She is Afraid that You Will Act Black (And Embarrass Her)
This concern is actually funny and serious at the same time. It is funny, because there are in fact white guys who think that they have to “act black” in order to win the heart of a black woman. Thanks to their narrow-minded idea of acting black, they walk around in baggy pants, listen to Tupac and put “though” after every sentence.
During the dating process this idiotic behavior can be quite funny and entertaining; at least when I can believe the black women I talked to. However, this can become a serious issue if the naïve white bread acts like that when he meets her friends, or even worse, her parents.
One girl told me that her father threw her boyfriend out of the house, because he acted like a complete retard. All he wanted was to act black, while her father, who had a doctor’s degree, interpreted it as the most disrespectful behavior he had ever seen.
Believe it or not, but there are quite a few black ladies who are afraid of getting embarrassed by their white boyfriends who think that acting like Lil Wayne is the key to acceptance in a black family.
If she is afraid that you will act black, she will never reveal that she wants to date white.
She is Afraid to Be the Bed Bunny and Never the Girlfriend
Okay, now we come to a serious reason why a black girl might not admit that she is into you, even though she totally is.
It is okay to not want a girlfriend. It is okay to keep it casual and it is also okay to have a one night stand with a woman without marrying her the next day. All those things are totally fine no matter if she is black, white or yellow. As long as you are honest about your intentions, there is nothing wrong with any of that.
The only problem is that a lot of white guys have to battle with the same misconceptions, conditioning and fears that black girls have to battle with. As a result, they often hide or deny the fact that they are in a relationship with a black girl, even though they are in one or at least want to be in one.
The painful truth is that some white men won’t call a black girl their girlfriend, even though she technically is.
When I heard from one African girl that her white boyfriend runs away whenever someone wants to take a picture of them, I understood that this is one of the biggest fears black women have.
All I can say is this:
If you have the courage to talk to her, to seduce her and to sleep with her, you should also have the courage to call her your girlfriend.
One of the best ways to find a beautiful black woman who will be proud to be your girlfriend is through this site:
A Black Girl Who Likes White Men is…
Now you know that a lot of black girls like white men. You also learned why it is so hard for a lot of African beauties to admit this truth and to show the white guys who would love to date them that they are in fact interested in.
To show you that a black girl who likes white men is not the self-hating race traitor that our society wants her to be, I now want to tell you from my own perspective what she really is.
A black girl who likes white men is…
Too intelligent to Be Narrow-Minded
You are a white guy and you are happily together with a beautiful black girl.
What does that say about her?
She is too intelligent to be narrow-minded. She is intelligent enough to not allow racial stereotypes and misconceptions to dictate her dating life. She is intelligent enough to not allow the past and the mistakes of the generations before us prevent or destroy something beautiful.
She is open-minded and she knows that love, sex and feeling connected to another person is beautiful, no matter if this person is black or white. She is open-minded enough to rethink false conditioning and to follow her heart.
You should be proud to date her.
Confident Enough to Not Care About Other People’s Opinions
She is confident enough to ignore the looks that you will certainly get. She is so confident in her own skin and with the decision to be together with you that she ignores all the staring, talking and gossiping.
And there will be a lot of it. This is just a foretaste of what she has to ignore:
“How is it to date a white guy?”
“Is it true that white guys have smaller dicks?”
“You don’t look as if you would date a white guy!”
“How did your parents react?”
“Look at her. Can’t find a decent black guy, huh?”
“Do you hate your own race?”
“This is disgusting. Gross!”
“Your kids won’t look like you at all!”
She is confident enough to withstand all this negativity and you are important enough for her to be with you anyway.
She is a strong human being who deserves a strong boyfriend.
Humorous Enough to Take the Jokes
Oh boy, she must have some humor to survive that.
All the once you go black you will never go back jokes and of course all the subtle racist jokes that “weren’t meant like that” can be quite annoying.
But she can deal with it. She has enough humor to not get angry when the twentieth male friend comes up to her and cracks a joke about the dick size of white guys in comparison to black guys. She can laugh it off and she is looking forward to laugh about it with the only person she really wants to laugh with. You.
Attracted to White Guys. Period
Yes, a black girl who admits that she likes white guys and who is not afraid to date a Caucasian man is intelligent, confident and has enough humor to survive all the funny, not so funny and really bad jokes.
But, there is one thing that she also is.
She is attracted to white guys. Period.
Even though she might just find it out after she finally kisses one for the very first time:
I know it’s a shock, but the truth is that there are black girls who are into white guys without any reason.
They are just normal human beings who are attracted to other normal human beings.
Get over it, accept it and embrace the fact that we live in a day and age that allows us to date whoever the hell we want.
That’s exactly what my friend Anton did…
UPDATE 23.07.2016: Case Study of a Man Who Found Love
A couple of days ago I checked my emails and what I found made my jaw drop.
I know what you are thinking, but no, it wasn’t an email from a female groupie. It was an email from Anton, an American man who read my article, overcame his limiting beliefs and found, in his own words, the love of his life.
There are only two things that turn Sebastian Harris into an emotional crybaby:
- My girlfriend says “I love you” while she looks at me with her cute puppy face.
- One of my readers finds the woman of his dreams because of one of my articles.
This time it was #2…
God, I was so damn happy (and a bit proud) when I read Anton’s email and he allowed me to share it with you as long as I don’t reveal his second name (It’s really hard to pronounce anyway). So, here’s the email he wrote me:
Anton took action and found the black woman of his dreams. Now it’s time for you to do the same…
Click here to find out everything about the interracial dating site where Anton found his dream girl
Summed Up Wisdom
Do black girls like white men? Yes, a lot of them do but not all of them admit it. The sad truth is that there are a lot of misconceptions about black girls who are into Caucasian men. A lot of people believe that those girls hate the color of their skin and some of them go so far and say that they betray their own race. Others are convinced that they want to brag with a white boyfriend and that they have a weird slave fetish.
The family can also be a major reason why there are many black girls who hide their preferences. In the same way as there are some racist white families, there are some racist black families. A woman who is labeled as a disgrace thinks twice before she admits that she is into white guys.
Besides her family, her own thoughts and anxieties contribute to more Caucasian men who ask themselves whether or not black girls like white men. She might be scared of social judgment. She might be worried that you think you have to act black. She might not even think that a white man can possibly be into her. And worst of all, she might be scared that she will always stay the bed bunny, but never become the girlfriend.
People say a lot of things about a black girl who likes white men, but the truth is that she is intelligent enough, confident enough and that she has enough humor to ignore the haters and to do what she wants. She is just a human being who is attracted to another human being.
True.
Have you’ve guys ever heard of Patricia Bright, Nikki Perkins, Mellody Hobson, and etc, cause if you did you will know without a doubt black women like white men and vice versa. If they didn’t people like Duchess of Sussex Megan Markle and recent Miss USA winner Cheslie Kryst wouldn’t exist.
Agreed
Congratulations and much cvontinued love and happiness
True!
You love who you love. End of story. It’s only a black/white thing if you make it that. No one should have to change, compromise, try harder to be with someone. If you can’t be yourself what is the point? Yes I am in an interracial relationship (married). There are only problems if you make them. If someone else has a problem with your relationship that is their problem not yours. It is not rocket science or difficult. If it works, it works!
Hey George,
I wish you all the best!
I am a 60 year old white male who has recently fallen in love with a 29 year old black lass of Dominican descent. The feeling is mutual.
This was in no way expected, planned nor even aspired to by either of us. A complete and utter shock for both of us.
I honestly can’t explain it much less understand it much beyond what I have already stated.
My heart has wings !!!
You’re probably right about american society, but european society is also going to the pits I think. Atleast Swedish society, Stockholm is the only society reference I have. But I look positively on the future.
Damn if only I met a sensible good looking woman like you here, white or black woman, doesn’t matter, really. I guess maybe it matters a little since I prefer dark skinned women. Problem here is most (I think) black women are muslims, so even though there are a few black women here, the odds aren’t great, I probably wouldn’t want to date a muslim woman because honor killings kinda turn me off, lol. I am 22 so the muslim girls my age are still kind of not out of their shells, if they will ever be, or maybe they are in their own way, what do I know..
But I have gone on two dates now with a black girl I went to high school with but I don’t think I like her, She’s kind of what you could call a loser, on welfare, no job and takes pills, she’s addicted I believe. Kinda upsets me I don’t like her but I kind of know it’s for the best to not go further with her.
But if I really want to, I will find “the woman”, I think (I hope)! 😀
Your family will survive it. Just don’t tell them that you’re a conservative and not a liberal 😛
Hey Yassin,
I’m sure you will find her.
I am a white man from Algeria I want to know a black girl to marry and build a bright future I love this since my childhood I wish God to help me marry a black woman I love and want very much Black woman Age 26
Really attracted to white men as far as I can remember, I dated very dashing African men but didn’t feel anything physically. Although my family wouldn’t be so happy about it, I am learning to accept what my heart wants, white men, I just can’t help it.
That’s so not true. Coming from a white gentleman
Wow…
Shut the fuck up, white men are more dominant than you and actually know how to make sweet love. Black guys fuck like an angry gorilla, it makes me puke amd cry because I secretly want to cheat on him with a white man, and black dick looks like crap. Creamy white dick ftw!! -black AMERICAN girl
Since when are white men abandoned by their own race?
Black women and white men are both having to deal with the reality of being abandoned by potential partners of their own race. They can no longer pretend that this isn’t happening. The reality is that I don’t think they’re compatible. Of course they have to deal with a lot of unfair political baggage and double standards. White women are social justice warriors when they date black men but black women are committing an act of betrayal. White women freely emphasize the sexual side of their relationship with black men whether the relationship is casual or serious . White women even seem to take great delight in gettIng pregnant and quickly left by the black father. On the flip side sex is very much a taboo subject and suppressed. Both black women and white men wish that there was an easy solution to being abandoned by their own race. But so far it’s not a great success story.
But compared to white they all are dark
It seems like you have a good taste.
Hope you find the right girl!
I am from middle east, love black ladies. its not about the color its how you feel about the person: therefore. it really does not matter who you going to date as long as both love each others.
true love does not come from color of your skin, I believe it as physical and spiritual connect,
Yep, as long as there’s attraction, everything is good.
Hey Tommy,
thanks for your inspirational comment…and I hope that your wife doesn’t find it 😉
I am a white guy and I live in that part of the world where you can see black girls only in a couple of cities, if any at all, yeah. Though I’m 29 and I’m married to a blue eyed fair hair my type of a girl, I was always into black girls as long as I remember myself. And the fact that in the states men can date these beautiful women while I can only look at them when I’m on my business trips makes me really sad.
I have like dozens of beautiful black girls on my instagram, i tried to write them and got 0 replies.
So, all those whinig guys who have beautiful girls of colour near them, stop whinig and be men for god’s sake and ignore all the prejudices in your heads.
Moreover, some of my closest friends adore black girls also, so I’m not alone
PS: From Russia with love
I’m a black woman and have dated black n white guys I think it shouldn’t be about colour.As long as there is a mutual attraction respect,trust and if u make each other happy then why not race and age shouldn’t be an issue.I’m 38 yrs old with two kids and wouldn’t mind meeting an older white guy preferably with kids as I don’t wish to have anymore kids
I’m interested to meet and date you
Not all but a lot. And I never said that they are desperate. It’s just a preference.
Not all black girls love white men or are desperate to marry one.
a lot of European guys are crazy for black women. But it’s also because we don’t have many.
that’s true
Black women have many shades of color. Not just dark skin✊✊✊✊
Well, I guess it is due to the fact that most of your readership is American. Personally, I think I would be better off with a European White man, a foreign non Black man or even a non Black man, who isn’t White. Especially with what is going on in society nowadays. American society is going to the pits and I want to avoid it a much as possible.
Many Black American men use Black women for sex too. The same ol’ scare tactics that White men only use Black women for sex is not always true. There are men in ALL races and nationalities who use women as objects for sexual gratification. I believe that the history between White American men and Black American women has been less than stellar so there has been a mutual apprehension and reluctance to seek each other out in dating and marriage. At the end of the day, I believe men should be vetted based on his character not his race.
Hey Claudia,
I hope your comment inspires a lot of white men to stop being reluctant.
Hey Erich,
enjoy their beauty!
Hey Iris,
you are absolutely right. The best thing a woman can o is to smile and make eye contact. Simple but effective.
Lately, I had this feeling liking black women is the new “in the closet” situation. When guys mention how much they like HW, guys 9.6/10 agree but treat you like you’re queer if you like BW..
HOWEVER, I notice some their actions don’t reflect their vocal “preferences”:
Some of white guys in Minnetonka, MN (shoutouts) are just . Like fresh out of Abercrombie
I cashiered at a busy Starbucks. Three of us were BW. The WM we’d serve had this rude edge, but as soon as we had convo they simmered down a bit and even complimented our smile.
We got more tips when the BW were on (12:1). Still waiting for one to drop his number in though lol. Your smile alone would have gotten us 18:1.
Come to a downtown in MN and wear a dress (or anything else that oozes “feminine”) and smile like you own this land. Lo and behold you got a man. I see WM with BW plenty here, and she’s usually Deep cocoa American or African.
Side note: Oooh one of the regulars looks like Ryan Sheckler (before he shaved his hair and aged like milk). I can’t Lord.
Point is, some may come off as bogus and distant, but again, you have some BW who, despite liking WM, do it too. I’ll admit I do it myself sometimes to save face/don’t wanna look silly. Travel indeed, but don’t lose hope yet!
I try not to be one of those people who say “preference” all the time, but fuuuuhhh…. how can you not with some WM these days
BW, keep smiling! Guys can’t resist the smile/eye contact. Use your God-given full lips to your advantage! Only then will they bow down… bwahaha
I love women. Green,orange,brown,white,yellow,blue. From 90 lbs. to 290 lbs. A woman that takes care of herself, dressed well (clean) smells nice, soap is an afrodeciac. That makes for an attractive woman for me. Most black women have POWER that turns me into jelly and curls my toes!!!
I’m a black woman and I really wish that white men would stop being reluctant to become involved with black women because of what they were taught, heard, seen, or forced to believe. To be totally honest from my heart, I am and always have been attracted to white men far more than black men. I’ve never been comfortable around black men, maybe that’s shameful that I feel that way. I was raised in a predominantly white area and that’s all that I saw was white boys and men. I’ve had many white men show some kind of interest or attraction to me but fear, of what I do not know, has always kept them away. This is just my opinion but a lot of white men would perhaps be happier if they would stop worrying about what people will say and follow their heart. God sees no skin color, he sees the heart. We as his creation should also see no skin color, only the heart.
Hey Amk,
most guys who read my articles about black women are American 😉
I am open to dating and marrying outside of my race especially White men. But I feel like White American men aren’t really into Black women. Many of my experiences and statistics point to the fact that the majority of them aren’t interested in dating and Black women. Maybe I will have a better chance with a European White guy since I see more of them with Black women as opposed to American White men.
I hope your husband doesn’t know that 😉
I’m a black woman, married to a black man (15 yrs) whom I truly love. I have 2 kids, have an MBA, and served in the US Army. I have dated many races. I believe there are insecurities on both sides, white men and black women. However, I can assure you that their are black women that love white men. I find that when my eyes slip towards another man, just looking of course, its the white men I find it harder stop gazing at…;-)
Hey Anders,
thanks for your comment. I’m German 🙂
Thank you for this article. For some reason I assume you’re American? Because I think interracial dating and love is more of an issue in the US. It seems the racial divide is growing larger and larger. With what’s been going on the past few years, Black Lives Matter and so on it is probably harder to date outside your race than it was just 5 years ago. I am not saying that we don’t have any problems in Northern Europe (Sweden), we do. We have racists here too. But you have to always remember that the racists are the exception, not the norm!
I have always been attracted to black women. It’s the colour of course, but there are also physical differences that I like and culturally there are often differences too. I didn’t date a black woman until i was well into my 40s, but after dating an African woman for the first time I just realised I had been right all along. I will never date a white woman ever again. My 2nd wife is African. Unfortunately we are divorced but that was personal differences, and not due to culture or race. The way I was brought up, the important part is what is inside. We all bleed red. And why are so many whites crazy about getting tanned in the summer? To look more brown :-))
We can’t really help who we are attracted to and my advise to everybody attracted to someone of another race is simply “Go for it!” .Yes, you will get comments from some people. Pity them. They don’t understand anyway and most likely they’re just jealous that you have something they don’t even know they want.
Saying that “white guys” look down on black women is like saying all black women thing the same. You don’t. Some white people don’t like blacks. Some black people don’t like whites. These people are called racists.
Hey Neil,
you can consider yourself lucky that you have found such a wife.
As a white man was/is attracted to dark skinned black women, I never understood the label “jungle fever”. If I said that I prefer blondes, people don’t say, “you like them dumb”, or redheads, “oh you like them fiery”. A man likes what he likes and not everybody likes the same; that is why there is not one real tired woman in the world. Can I say why I like kinky hair and dark skin? No. I just do and always have.
I thank the Lord for my beautiful dark skinned wife with very kinky hair who gave me two wonderful children; who helped care for my father in his dying days; who checks on my mother always. As a side note: my mom always picks Vanessa’s side in any argument we have; she gave her grandchildren. When the world beats me up, I have my wife to help me.
As for the comments about lovem and leave them; that can be any skin hue, white, black, brown, Asian, and can often be attributed to youth. When I met my future wife, I was ready to settle down (my biggest concern was could I date a CPA; they always seemed so serious). I think it is that simple.
Nice to see an honest post
True!
Yes, black girls love white men.
I bet
Hey Denila,
exactly, just because you are attracted to someone doesn’t mean that you have a weird fetish.
The problem is, in many cultures outside of the U.S., mixed race looking people like Ciara or Beyonce (yes, they are biologically mixed race), are not necessarily considered black, but mixed race. The U.S. has its own perception of “black” where Lupita Nyong’o and Vanessa Williams are both considered black…Some men prefer certain African women because of their culture, and would not be attracted to the culture of an American woman, who may happen to be black.
I personally have no problem with a white man who is attracted to mostly darker women, with more West African features. I’m black and medium/light complexioned and I like all types of men, but when it comes to white men, I’m not usually attracted to blonde/blue eyed, Anglo-Saxon types and culture, redheads, skinny French men lol, If a man prefers darker skin, that’s his thing. There are a lot of black women who have a fetish for very dark black men too and have no problem saying they are not attracted to light skinned, or more European looking black men. How is that different? Some white men prefer brunettes or redheads, some like a big chest and butt. Is that not a “fetish”. Why do we have to be singled out as some fetish if all the time? If some man is naturally attracted to a certain type of woman, so be it.
Here iam I love all shades of Black woman light dark I don’t care they just make my heart go pitty pat
Hello I’m a white guy and love those Nubian queen s they’re sexy, great smiles beautiful eyes. I have always been attracted to you lovely ladies.
Hey Chris,
awesome. All the best to your family!
Hey Tiffany,
I hope this inspires some black ladies.
Not all of us.
Hey Keke,
maybe you haven’t met the right one 😉
Wow. Your comment blew me away. I’m glad that I could help.
Wow, this article changed my perspective for the better. In retrospect of the South African history of Apartheid, I found it hard for me to believe that black and white relationships were real. Perhaps that’s because people whom I witnessed were in such relationships were those I could see only on TV and never saw live. I’m a 25yrs old black woman and I never went to multiracial schools (except this one where my principal was white, but it didn’t count because he didn’t seat in class with us). So when I went to the university, obviously there were people of different skin colors and race, I tried to make white friends – and to be honest, this one girl who ended up being my friend was nice. However, since I also had black friends aside (boys and girls), it was weird to be the only one in their group who had a white friend. As a result I started feeling uncomfortable and withdrew from this white friend of mine. As Nelson Mandela had said, that one learns hatred against people of other races the same way that he learns love, I never was a racist. But as I remember, all those TV programs and documentaries about the past, and peoples’ talks that seemed rather harmless, actually had these insidious effects on me and my mind which practically changed my view of whites and left me with some sort of dislike or mistrust against them. But the worse thing is that, as I’ve mentioned my age, I’ve never dated a black guy nor have I dated a white guy. To be frank, I’ve never dated a guy of any race because I’m only attracted to white guys. Even I don’t understand why, and I’ve been trying to get rid of this feeling for years since I’ve become a young adult. The thing is that I’d like to be with a white, but as you mentioned it in your article, I feel like it’s wrong and I feel like people are going to assume the worse about (you know like dating a white guy as a trophy). I hate admitting this but I’m way too insecure and I realised that when this other time I repelled these two white guys who showed some interest in me. I kinda have this perception that white guys are sex maniacs. And now I’m still just single because I’m fighting with my shilly-shally mind and my insecurities. And to make myself feel better, I chose to believe that I’m having a ‘relationship’s block’, like a writer’s block. I’m a writer anyway, so I’m kinda like in a relationship with my work instead. But it’s really uncool. This article was very personal. It made me think, laugh, regret, and cry.
This read made me giggle a bit. I’m a black chick who doesn’t show interest in white guys because I’m apathetic towards them. There is no secret desire or attraction for them.
you are completely correct
Just be careful with these white guys my sisters. Try to meet someone that wants you because of you. Not because they are lonely or looking for an ego boost. White men look down on us and see us as an object, not a human being.
Hell YES…
Excuse the language. But yes. To me you guys got way better conversation your funny more fun to be around your cool white skin feels amazing against our very warm brown skin and don’t believe the hype. Not all black guys are amazing in bed and all that. In my opinion yr bedroom game is much better. Your more open more oral not as in a rush to put it in more considerate and not all about yrself. Hardworking for the most part. Just working period. I could go on n on. Don’t be scared n don’t believe the lies. Get you a brown girl. We’re not stuck up or too busy thinking were better to realize that were not.
White man who has been married to my african American wife for 9 years now. With two beautiful kids. Go for what or who you like amd forget what everyone thinks.
You should check out my KenyanCupid review!
Yes, I like white men and am from Kenya
Hello..I found this article interesting. I am a black girl living in Kenya. I like white men…I need me some vanilla
m interested in white guys……I’m 23 years old black and slender in body……..so any white guy interested plz contact me
There are millions. Check out my Afrointroductions review. I’m white and I got replies from African girls from all kinds of countries.
I’m a white guy who adores and loves black women but I know that I never have a chance. Are their black women who actually like white guys?
Hey Precious,
most of them are afraid of getting scammed. You have to earn our trust 😉
Hey Steve,
that’s interesting. Usually, I get emails from guys who want a young Asian woman. Do whatever you want. Just try to not hurt your wife too much in the process.
I was unfortunate enough to let not one, but two black ladies slip away from me, and I have never forgotten them. Now, I fear I’m too old to be of any interest to almost any lady, at 64…. I am married to a Thai lady now, who is nice, but much younger than I I would love to meet a older slim black woman of ray forever partner.
There is a incredible mystic and aura around a tall handsome woman of colour, a confidence and stature not many white women have. To be in that light again would be incredible…
Thank you so much for this post..But it’s so painful that most white guys I’ve met have trust issues
Congratulations “old guy”! May God richly bless your union as He has! It’s taken courage to sustain that love over 30 years.. so happy for the both of you…you and your wife are the real heroes:-)
actually the comment above was directed to Dohn:-)…congratulations on your courage and Valor .for finding love and your soul mate…keep on getting your swirl on”!
I’m sure you will
Black girls love white girls. And I one of them. This article comes with a relief and encouragement too. I’m single and hope to find a sweet, fine white man
Wow. So nice. I wish to meet an awesome white man too
Hey Woody,
awesome. I wish you luck with her.
Hey Madrine,
You should read my Afro Introductions review and join the site.
Hey Princessana,
glad to hear that 😉
Wow! I love your article… You just gave me hope
Hello there!
Thanks a lot for all the advice you have point out on your article that are helpful to many of us. I myself been having a lot unanswered question but now they are answered somehow. I’m an African and grow up in Uganda, An East African country where there is less white people more so in my village. Though ever since i was little until now I’m so much attracted and i want to date and marry a white man. it’s not because i grow up seeing them or else, but I just have that in my heart and I still hope that somehow somewhere I will meet the love of my life. But what i I ask myself is how while i meet him? this bathers me a lot because i have never traveled abroad or even meet one in my society.
and however much i try to get it off my heart, it just can’t though i tried to date black guys but things went the other way, I’m in confusion and i don’t know what to do.
I recently found myself a Mocha Princess. She is beyond words. I have always dated white girls, I was never really attracted to black girls. I wasn’t racist or anything but it just wasn’t a big deal to me. For some reason as I got older, I started finding black girls fascinating, sexy and beautiful. I went to a dating site shortly after my divorce and found someone that I just clicked with. We went on a date and I probably had the best time of my life. Man she was fun, beautiful sexy, smart, everything you could want in a woman and she liked me, just some white dude. We have been dating ever since as a matter of fact she just texted me as I was writing this and she’s coming over to watch some Netflix with me and hopefully more. I have never had this much fun dating and I have never had a woman treat me this well. I see this going places. White guys, don’t limit your horizons, black chicks are friggen awesome! In my opinion, if you treat a black girl well she will treat you better.
Hey Buddy,
don’t worry. I don’t take it seriously. I just thought that this trolling comment was funny. That’s why I approved it 😉
your a troll, despite what you are saying women like Condola Rashad & Serena Williams who are African American women just recently got engaged to white men who love them, even serena’s sister Venus Williams has a white boyfriend.
To Sebastian Harris, jydo sounds like a troll, a black American troll, don’t take that rubbish comment seriously. These men trolls trash people like serena Williams looks but get mad when she is engaged to a white man
This comment proves exactly why I encourage you guys to date foreign women. There’s just too much hate and bitterness in the West…
Hey Dohn,
thanks for sharing your story. I hope it inspires a lot of guys.
Well, I live in the most racist, or what most of the country considers. Mississippi is my home, but I have always been attracted to black women. Doesn’t matter how dark or light. I finally met one 4 years ago that I started seeing from California. We talked on the phone a few months, then finally went out. We enjoyed each other’s company so decided to keep on seeing where it would go. We’ve been married about a year and a half now and we’get never been happier. She is my queen and I her king. Opposites attract? I’m a country boy and she’s an LA girl. One thing I love about the gulf coast is if you look around and keep your eyes open? Their are mixed couples everywhere down here… loved your story..keep it up
u r african you don’t know anything ,black american women usually don’t date white men because they have lived with white men and they know most white men have small penises and cant sexually satisfy them, most of these african women don’t even know their race is stronger and sexually more dominant and they go for smaller dick size white men, but black american women who have been exposed and know this go for black men there is no competition in both races as to who is stronger and sexually better. that is why black men are having sex with white women more than white men are having sex with black women.
Hey Alex,
the last time I checked I had a dick. Oh, and white skin.
It’s great to hear that you have found your king. Don’t let the opinions of others stop you. If you love each other you need to do everything to stay together.
Hey Marva,
thanks for sharing your experiences and for your kind words. Loving without barriers is the whole point. Merry Christmas!
I so loved this article! I am an ex army brat & can say moving around outside the US to many different countries has a lot to do w/ why I prefer to date outside my race. I have been around so many different places & are friends w/ so many different races & ethnicitys. I’ve never been one to see black or white or Latino or Asian or any other race. I just like people; cool awesome people that I liked & enjoyed hanging out w/ as friends or in a relationship. I dig white men because I just do! I don’t feel there has to be a reason why I do I just proudly do. Of course there are things I love about a white man & things that I love about being w/ a white man. I love the passion we deliver to each just from a gaze hug and/or kiss. I love the feel & look of our skin together. (Yes I really do) Oh my & the kissing!!!!! Amazing!!!!!! Our conversations & true understanding respect & love of each other, our values, priorities, wants, needs, goals, fanticies, adventures, up bringing, education & the dynamic of just being ourselves & not caring what ANYONE thinks whether it be family or friends. It doesn’t matter nor will I ever let it define who I should love or not love. As most black women would say I too had an awesome dad who was the road map for the type of man I derseved. I also have 2 older brothers that are black men themselves. It doesn’t mean I don’t love me or my race! The fact that I am able to love who I love makes me even stronger & more confidence in myself & my race. When it comes down to it non of us are pure of any one race. My family has so many many different races & ethnicitys that you wouldn’t believe. Love is Love & there is no way in the world I will EVER change how I feel, what I prefer & want I like. That applies to just about every aspect of my life minus a few. (After all I do consider myself an adventurous woman so my adventures will change) Not becuase I love white men & one in particular but because I love life & I just love people; period! Life in itself is an adventure so get out there & explore. Have an open mind & know there is more to life than what your told, what you see, what you hear or what your friends or family tell you. Learn for yourself & think for yourself. I love white men proudly & have no shame in it. It is what it is, but in that I love black men too, after all remember I do have black sliblings & my dad was black. I love love & all that it brings! God knows our desires! Don’t be ashamed or be shamed out of embracing your desires what ever they may be. Again this was a very awesome educational article. I will have to share this w/ my guy for sure.
Have a great day & Merry Christmas!
I Love w/out barriers,
Marva L.
Thank you for the article …I am a black young African women I never really wish or fantasied about dating a white guy but guys my race never really liked me while white guys find me sexy n attractive dated quit a lot of them today Iam committed to one I call my King n my husband to be……We really love each other n we make jokes about every race…problem at present are our parents especially mine never met his too we only talk about them. We want to take things to the next level but it doesn’t look easy. People always have something to say n not knowing how our parents will react…actually spoke to mine a couple of times they really don’t have a problem but they really see no future on our relationship…you know our parents can be racist some how….But hey no matter what I don’t see anything stoping us so people who are against these kinda relationships should really keep their opinions to themselves because the more you talking n discriminates these kinda couples you actually making their relationship more stronger n for them to hold onto each other… From experience I don’t care who so ever says what n I don’t see myself dating another race white guts are cute n lovely in everyway
I can’t believe it! They finally did it they used a black woman to pretend she is a white dude to write this article for the last few marches of a failing swirl movement. I am laughing they went this far!
Connecting with a woman can always be special, no matter if she’s black or white. I totally agree with you that it’s important to get past your comfort zone and to appreciate the differences and the variations in life.
I am a “white” man from the USA. As I get older the more I realize that the terms people use to describe their identity are so unnecessary. I am not actually the color white anymore that a dark skinned person from Africa is actually the color black. When you connect with the opposite sex in my case, find some common ground and smile its special. Even if it doesn’t escalate past that. Ever since 4th grade I was into foreign girls and all ethnicities. Get past your comfort zone and appreciate the differences and the variations in life.
just don’t care about what most people think and get yourself a white guy. Like you said, you should embrace your differences. There’s nothing wrong. The one website that I can really recommend is Afro Introductions. It’s the perfect site for girls like you who want to meet a white man.
Yes black girls like white guys. I am also one of those girls, but I’ve never had an opportunity to be with one. I’m hoping that some day my white Prince will come my way and make my world golden.
Most people (even black people) perceive black girls who are attracted to white males as “gold diggers” and that is not true. I’ve seen some swirl couples who embrace their differences, culture and build one another from nothing to something and that is what true love is about. I hope that some day it finds me.
I haven’t heard of her but I promise that I will check out her channel.
You welcome and Hello again Sebastian, with your influence I want to ask you a favor. There’s a woman by the name of christelyn Karazin who has a YouTube channel that is being attacked by white and black racist cause her platform represents what you stand for in this article. The favor I want to ask is if you and others you know who stand for true genuine love of black women and white men, subscribe to her channel on YouTube. These Stone Age people need to be stopped
Hey Ben,
I really appreciate your comment but the next time please don’t use all caps 😉
IT’S ALL ABOUT LOVE AN RESPECT..IT UPSETS ME HOW BLACK GUYS SLANDER AND CALL BLACK WOMEN SELL OUTS CAUSE THEY DATE WHITE GUYS.. WELL BRO IF YOU CAN’T SEE THE BEAUTY IN ALL BLACK SISTERS, DON’T DISS THEM IF YOU DON’T WANT TO TAKE CARE OF THEM..ESPECIALLY WHEN SO MANY OF YOU GUYS LIKE WHITE GIRLS….NO DOUBLE STANDARD.. BLACK QUEENS THAT WANT TO DATE WHITE GUYS, JUST BE YOUR SWEET SELF, AND YOU’LL FIND THE RIGHT GUY.. WHITE GUYS TELL ME THEY WANT TO DATE BLACK GIRLS AN DON’T FEAR REJECTION FROM THEM, BUT THE DO FEAR FAMILY REJECTION… GOT TO GOOD WHERE YOUR LOVED AND APPRECIATED…..
I’m sure you’ll find the right guy on Afrointroductions
I am black woman and I have a thing for handsome masculine white men. In the past I even went o dating side to try to find my prince charming but to no avail. I love Italian and middle east men but others also.
Fetish the darker the berry the sweetier the juice if it were not the case then look at all the interracial websites. Darker like Lopita in 12 Years a Slave.
Honestly as an African-American a little darker than Beyonce and not Biracial I believe its a fetish for both White men and many white women when it comes to darker skin. If you look at the interracial Black and White websites that is all you see dark on white. Yet, sistas like many races of women want their own men! Black men are in demand! It is hard everyone wants to be loved we need that if you are going to date white men one healthy way to determine if he is into you as a person is to see if he is attracted to all shades of Blackness. I am not talking Biracial but all African -Black. If it is a skin tone fetish he or she will probably see sistas who look like Ciara or Lisa Rae who are African_Black as equally as beautiful. Light skinned or brown skinned sista have kinky hair as well. If it is a fetish then he will see these latter two women as “white” and that is not what gets him off!
Hey Anthonia,
you are welcome.
Thanks a lot … I live white guys. Been like this since forever but never had the opportunity to date one…
Hmmm… She is here
Jesus, that’s a bit harsh.
White guys love black girls. The only ones who don’t are inferior products of white trash parents.
Hey Mark,
hearing your story makes me sad. But I hope your words inspire some of the younger guys to take their chance and to date whoever they want. It’s not the 70s anymore.
In my thinking people in general place too much importance on color and other aspects of folks as a common species. I personally have always been attracted to black women as a white guy..and it has nothing to do with some twisted fetish. I love to look at the beauty of many black women starting with their faces. My first love was a black girl whom I took to the high school prom (during the time when racial relations were not very good..’70s) If her folks and mine not have become involved at the time I would have made her my wife. Unfortunately, it did not turn out that way. We still keep in touch occasionally but the oceans of time have kept us apart. If interracial relationships had not been so taboo at the time..she would have been the mother of my children and matriarch of my family.
Hey Chey,
I personally think that mixed women are beautiful and I know a lot of guys who feel the same. And yes, living out your fantasies is totally okay.
This was a good read – Thank you for publishing this. I love love love white guys that express the way they feel about sisters. I dated black men my whole life because i have always thought white guys are just not into black girls. Recently I have been pursuing white guys and now thats all im attracted to…i can’t help it. I however am bi racial so im not dark at all. Do white guys like mixed chicks? I love the skin contrast omg it drives me crazy. I can honestly admit being with a white guy making live to him..even holding his hand or kissing him makes me feel in a way black men can do. Being with whute guy is my fantasy and that’s okay.
very, very true!
Talk to each other. It does not matter who is white or black. If you want each other go for it. I am a white man (from the same place that produced the Ku Klux Klan) who has been married to black woman (from the same place) for nearly 30 years. When you get married understand that your closest relative is your spouse. If anyone else doesn’t accept you it is their loss not yours.
Hey Lagos,
thank you so much for this insightful comment. I honestly didn’t know that Bob Marley and so many other celebrities had a white father. Thanks again for all the work you put into this comment.
Im a Nigerian American female and to answer you question? Yes, black women like white men cause I have seen some Nigerian females and other african & Caribbean women married to european men in England. All of the popular Nollywood & Hollywood biracial actresses and actors in Africa are born from Black african women & foreign white men(ex. Maid Michel, Van Vicker,, Ramsey noah, Lillian Bach, Caroline Ekanem and etc). However most of the time when I see it expressed its from Foreign Black women NOT so much from African american women. Sometimes I feel african american women who are attracted to white men are shut down by their family members, Community or people who are close to them so many of them not all are afraid to express themselves when it comes to their attraction for white men. The only african american females I have seen with white men, were a few personally and these women weren’t the Ghetto ones. Then it was the famous african american women like Diana Ross, Tina Turner, Donna Summer, Rapper Eve, Melody Hobson, and etc. I would also like to add that there is a african american woman by the name of Christly Karazin that has a site that gives advise for black women who are open to or only interested in men outside their race. She had been getting popularity recently cause she is a voice particularly for african american women who have interest in white men but don’t have a place for them to voice their true feelings without feeling bad but Christelyn has changed that.
I would also like to add that some of the most popular youtube interracial couples or bloggers on youtube now are Black women & white men couples and almost all these black women are foreign.
I think these couples are popular cause they represent a positive image of black women & white men couples, Black women & white men couples are increasing in America(higher outside America), and those couples are being more represented in the media (ex. Scandal, How to get away with murder and etc) then the typical black man & white woman couple people feel are the only black and white relationships that exist. Thats why I feel Iman & David Bowie was so admired, not only cause Iman was a super model and David Bowie was a rock star Icon but also because they represented a couple people and the media ignores or treats as if they don’t exist.
p.s. If black women and white men weren’t into each other people like Tia & Tamara Mowry, Lauren London, Leila Arcieri, Bob Marley, Jerry Rawlings, Lenny Kravitz, Jennifer Freeman, Noemie Leonir, Thandie Newton, Amandla Stenberg, and more would not exist.
“.You all just have to go with your heart and what you love and want to love.” This is very true. And I am glad to hear that you love all men.
Hello,
I read your article and I was very surprised by it. I am a dark skinned black woman and my husband is a white American man. He has blond hair and hazel eyes he is German and Polish. I am attracted to him because he is really funny and I am never afraid to be myself around him. We have one child that is a girl and she is beyond beautiful and life is great. As far as my upbringing and dating history go my parents never put boundaries on who I should like. I have dated Philippine, Chinese, Korean, African, Polish White guy, American Irish white guy, Italian American Puerto Rican, Ecuadorian, American Latinos. I never felt like I wasn’t attractive to them or that I was doing anything wrong. I certainly never felt less black because I am so dark skinned I think that I may have an advantage in that I can’t be viewed as anything else. I am black. My friends are like the men I dated all different colors and shapes and sizes. I think only one person ever commented on the guys that I dated and it was my twin brother. He wanted to know if I hated black men. My answer was that I don’t limit myself just to loving black men, I love ALL men. I say taste the man rainbow! There is a whole world of men that love you black ladies. There is also a whole world of women that love you white guys.You all just have to go with your heart and what you love and want to love.
Hey Toni,
interesting that you say this. I actually forgot to mention that aspect, but I am going to address it in an article I am going to publish soon. I agree that women want someone who loves them for them. Men want the same.
I read through the article and in all fairness it came across as quite twee. As a Black woman, the main reason I question dating a White man is the whole concept of fetishism. To ignore it in your article is quite odd. A lot of Black women, including myself will question dating a White man on the basis that essentially we are being objectified for being ‘Other’. You reference the guy who rocks up at his girlfriend’s parents house ‘playing at being Little Wayne’ – there are White men out there who think that Black women are all about hip hop and rap culture and think that getting with her gives them carte blanche to play ‘Black’ and pretend that they understand what it means to be Black in Western society.
White men are in a position of privilege and intelligent Black women appreciate this. They don’t want to date someone who thinks they are doing them some kind of service or who is only with them to ‘play at being ‘Black’.
Women in general want someone to love them for them – not the colour of their skin or how exotic they are perceived to be. You preaching about the dos and don’ts for dating a Black Woman are akin to stating how best to lure something – it’s as if getting with a Black Woman is a game…
Make the first move. Maybe he’s just shy.
Hey Candy,
you have to communicate to your mother that racism on both sides is not the answer.
All of this is very true I’m scared of the way people will see me. I’m only 17 today is my birthday actually and my family was at my house celebrating it with me but then they went on Facebook watching all the killing videos from the white cops in america against the black community then they turned on me. My mum HATES that I like white guys and so do most of my family (I’m Jamaican) and I really have tried to like black guys but they arnt my thing anymore ever since I’ve been in England white guys seem to be what I like. I can’t help it. My mum says she won’t accept me or him if I bring a white guy home she says its a disgrace and that rascim runs in their families. I try to tell her that my generation isn’t like that put she tells me that they won’t accept me and that they dont like me their just using me and family means everything to me so now I’m here stuck tryna like black guys and idk what to do.
Okay….. I’m a black south African female teen. I recently moved to the town I’m currently in a year and a half ago, before I moved I lived in a cul-de-sac road with all my friends as neighbors, all black. School was great, English based schools so standard was relatively high. Now I live here in a duplex with mostly whites, I like one of the guys here, the closest we get to conversation is the “hey” or acknowledgement nods when we pass each other on my way to jogging and I notice he stares but our conversations are monosyllabic, I like him he’s really good looking plus I need to make friends here I’m not used to sitting in the house so much but I don’t know how to approach them, if they’re out they chill with their phones out and my biggest problem would be what they’d think of me if I did approach, I mean they are on their phones and I’d eat someone if they’d disturb me. Besides I usually click better with them provided they approach unless I’m feeling brave. And you know how society is :/
I might be the white man of your dreams.
Awesome!
i am a proud african lady and i look forward to date the white man of my dreams…
Hey Ed,
thanks for sharing your personal experience. Glad you found happiness.
Very interesting observations, unfortunately, all true. We as a society, although many won’t agree, have not evolved enough to right all the wrongs brought about by cultural ignorance. There are a lot people in denial, who talk a great game, but when confronted, just turn and run or reference a distant past societal behavior. I can recall being seriously in a relationship with a magnificent black women. We were getting ready to forge our future together.We took our intentions before her parents. Her mom loved me and was so excited for us. Dad however, cursed me up and down, telling me he would not let me subject his daughter reactions of the white and black communities of a biracial couple, not to mention any offspring.
That was more than 20years ago. Today, I have fallen in love again, with a beautiful black women. Now, it’s great for us both. Our friends are jealous because I guess it is that obvious that our love shows. My parents have passed, but hers are so excited for us and are already hinting about being grandparents.
Yes, the times they are a changing, just not fast enough to suite me.
Hey Drea,
that’s awesome. I am really happy for you. And I knew that you smell like vanilla 😛
Really interesting subject.
I have dated white guys most of my life. Mostly, it was because of the people I hung out with – all races but few blacks lived in my area. i have always been attracted to black men too.
I married a white guy. It doesn’t matter what color he though. He makes me laugh hysterically and makes love to me like I’m the only woman on earth. No woman can argue with that. I say go for it. Do your thing. Screw what anyone else says or thinks. They’re not evolved yet.
My husband’s a physician and so good at his job that he wins the hearts of almost all people who come into contact with him. I love him with all of my heart. Sometimes I think about the day one of us will die and I start to cry. That’s how much I adore this man.
People have been racist towards us on countless occasions. He doesn’t notice as much as I do. He doesn’t care is why he doesn’t notice. As a couple, I know that we experience life differently than same race couples, so our love is quite strong. It’s as if people, esp. white people, want us to break up. Any time we have conflict, people can’t wait to judge, trash or disown me. It’s interesting to watch. There is always gossip about us between people we don’t even notice are there. Of course, since he’s a doctor, white women are more jealous than if he were a janitor. You also get to see the most liberal peoples’ racism up close and personal. My attitude about it is that God’s in charge because God picked him for me.
Black girls might be a little harder on a white guy You might have to prove your strength on levels that with white and Asian women usually take for granted. At least, that is my story. He had to “work: to receive my loyalty. But when you receive the loyalty of a black woman, it should blow your mind. We will fight to the finish for anything and everything you desire – in and out of the bedroom. i also needed to be sure I wasn’t a fetish, and that we could discuss cultural issues from a healthy perspective. That did not happen overnight but we got there.
He chased me until I couldn’t run any faster. It was the most passionate courting ever. Still is. And yes, I do smell like vanilla.
Hey Dom,
I am glad that you found the most awesome person you ever met 😉
Yeah my wife is exactly half Asian half Latina. Mom Asian Dad Latino. I get both Hispanic men and Asian men dirty looks. Asians see her as Asian Hispanics see her as Latina. But especially Asian dudes? Oh they HATE when us white dudes date or marry the Asian gals. I think it’s because Asian men have a hard enough time in the dating world, then add to that that their Asian women? Are the most desired group among ALL men. Black, White, Hispanic men all want Asian women. I don’t love my wife because she is Asian or Latina. I lusted after her when I first met her because she was nutty sexy. But fell in love with her because she also ended up being the most interesting awesome person I ever met.
Then you get the same looks that I sometimes get from Asian guys when I walk hand in hand with my Asian girlfriend.
Hey Fredrick,
I agree with everything you said. I hope this comment inspires a lot of men and women.
Hey Gerardo,
well said. Nothing in life is more beautiful than love. True words.
Interesting information, its really shameful that in this time when the world is suffering a lot, humans live with stupid religious, color, race discrimination, humans must love us and if we can of course help us each other, it doesnt matter color, religion , etc. Talking about this article, in my point of view all women with any race or color have the power to enter in the deepest part of your heart, women of all races can be beautiful, in my case i admire Middle Eastern women beauty, they are my favorite, but i also know that my heart can be stolen by other women of any race and color of the universe, and also black women are in this list. My favorite beauty of women are in Middle East, but i also are open to any color. Nothing in the life is more beautiful than love. The people shouldnt be afraid about the size of the spear, or color or beautiful face, these things are supperficial, supperficial things can be destroyed easily, but the courage, tenderness and strength of love never!!!!! Returning to the theme, if a woman is sweet, affectionate, with a tenderness and warm heart enough to cure the wounds of the life and the sadness, and like me she want to create the strongest bond of love….i will receive her with open heart, comming to me in the race, form or color they come. Greetings
Love, like water, must find its own level. Love should be color blind and build memories not barriers. I am old now but all that kept me from dating black or brown or asian was opportunity. Racism is so not the way to go nor does marrying within your own skin gurantee happiness. Grasp every opportunity at love for soon you will be old and sitting alone on the proverbial park bench. Don’t let race, creed or color deny you the joy of a wonderful woman or man.
I have some experience with many of the things in this article as a white dude in a serious relationship with an Indian woman in Australia. We got stares from some whites (mostly just curious, it must be said. I mean i couldn’t seem to help staring at interracial couples even when i was part of one myself.) The looks we got from most (though not all) indian people – especially guys – were just *evil*. It never seemed to bother her too much. For my part i thought it was hilarious. Got a bit of a kick out of it to be honest. It’s the troll in me.
Hey Destiny,
it’s true that people in interracial relationships have to deal with racism, but I am happy tha you and your boyfriend are so happy together.
I Love white men i have been in a relationship with my bestfriend for 10yrs now and we are planning our wedding we have a beautiful son and i had a daugther before i met him. I like him have endured the racist remarks and we smile and keep trucking it. On the other hand i have heard kids ask my daughter why her skin is different from her brothers and i told her to tell them its the way god wanted it to be. Sadly this is something common in the world but you have to be strong and deal with it dont let what others say rule your life. Just remember only God can judge you.
Hey Dani,
thanks for sharing your opinion and your experiences. Great comment.
Maybe it’s the difference between the UK and the US, but these are not really reasons why I wouldn’t date a white man or wouldn’t show interest in one. Yes, I do tend to think white men aren’t interested in black women, but there have been enough times when I could tell a white guy was interested but just too scared to approach me or ask me out. In the US, white people tend to have a superiority complex, and it’s not just relative to black people as anyone from other countries should know (because white Americans very much think they’re better than pretty much all non-Americans)–but it’s strongest relative to black Americans, and many white Americans are this way without even realizing it.
In the US, the odds are good that a white person who is attracted to you also looks down on black people, and either they view you as an exception/different from “other blacks” and will make subtle racist comments about blacks to you or they struggle with being attracted to you while also looking down on you because of race (kind of like you mentioned about white guys not wanting to acknowledge a black woman sometimes as their girlfriend). So, frankly, when I interact with white people–especially white men, who, in the US, often come off as thinking they’re better and smarter than everyone, including white women–I’m always thinking that this person probably thinks I’m physically unattractive, I’m inferior to them or both. A white person has to be incredibly friendly to make me feel otherwise, and it’s not a great feeling to have around a large percentage of the population because it’s hard to escape it. It makes it hard to even be friends with a white person, at least for me.
The other really big thing is race and racial issues are a huge part of my life as a black person who still experiences discrimination. It has nothing to do with slavery at all. I just don’t want to date someone who doesn’t really understand that or understand the things I go through, why I view the world the way I do, why I view whites the way I do, why I don’t feel comfortable certain places, etc, and I definitely don’t want to always have to explain this stuff to a white man. When I’m with a black person and sometimes even an Asian person, we talk about these issues and are on the same page and nothing has to be taught or explained. I’ve been really close friends with white women, and the friendships have been frustrating at times because of this. I don’t want to deal with this in a relationship. Like, you indicated in this post that you’ve asked different black women questions in order to understand issues in your post better, and you also draw conclusions about race, openness to interracial dating, etc, that I don’t agree with that are just down to totally different experiences and mindsets due to racial and nationality differences.
As far as the trophy issue, black men view white women as a trophy more than black women view white men that way, but both blacks do it–a lot more blacks than you seem to think. Like I said, we’re sent messages all the time that we’re inferior to white people and are often treated that way, too, especially in the US. When a black person can get a white person to date or marry them, it boosts their self-esteem because of this because it’s the feeling of being accepted or validated by someone “better” than them–not all blacks in interracial relationships, but many of them. Self-worth is tied up in dating whites for many blacks, and that’s why in the US black men who have good careers and make good money tend to be with white women more often than other black men are–they start to feel they’re good enough and worthy enough to attract someone “better” than a black woman. For the black women who do the trophy thing, it’s not usually about money/career–it could be education or only feeling attractive if a white person thinks they’re attractive or something else.
I am happy for you Tracy!
I have an amazing boyfriend, who happens to be white. I’m glad we didn’t let color be a barrier. I’m with a man I can’t see myself without.
The sad truth is that both a lot of black and white people are racist agains mixed couples. And yes, she deserves respect if she is willing to face racism for her decision to date a man with a different skin color.
Hey Bill,
great to hear that you are also open to dating interracial.
Hey Lon,
true, a lot of black women are incredibly beautiful. Great to hear that you also believe in interracial dating.
Hey Portia,
it’s great to hear that you have found the right guy. And yes, it is true that people will always talk and that life is too shot to worry about what people say or think of you.
Good words indeed, I am so into White men and yes Thank God I’ve finally met my Caucasian man he is from Spain and I am from South Africa we met 2 years ago and next year he is moving to South Africa for good, I love my Fiance with all I have, and we are expecting our first child in February. The only advice I will give to black girls who likes white men is that just be yourself follow your heart and dreams and careless about what people say to u. People will always talk. Enjoy your life while it’s still last. Life is too short to worry about what people say or think of u, if u busy living people’s life you will end up going no where.
I have dated black women in the past when I was younger. but I have always dated dark asian women. spent most of my time in southeast asia. but I have always thought that black women are beautiful and always will. but I am different. the other day I saw 3 black women in the base commissary who are related. married to white military members. one was in the army one navy and one marine corps. they have beautiful children. I believe in interacial marriage. have been in one for 34 years.
I am a white guy but have dated several black women. The first time was in Hawaii in 1977. We got some snide comments from whites and from a few black guys. In the mid 80’s I dated several black women in Los Angeles and we did not get one nasty comment or even a second look. I am married to white woman but if I were single I would not hesitate to date a black woman. Frankly everyone is so absorbed with their smart phone that they don’t notice a thing.
I’m not into black women, i’m into asians, and i really to see how it’s possible to be attracted by both since it’s just the opposit, in any perspective.
However those racist BS like “she do it because she hates her own colore” or “she does it because of slave fetishism” really makes me seek. Those people are so stupid. Racism is discusting.
Most of black people date each other, are friends with each other. 90% of african-american voted for Obama, that’s an official statistic. So it’s unbelivable how racist toward whights most blacks are. So when i see a black woman who dates a whight man i feel a lot of respect toward her, knowing the fact that 1/ it means she isn’t racist contrary to most black people and 2/ she is willing to face all the racism and judgments from her family and friends